Pirates!
Nov 18, 2008 General Nonsense |
I love pirates. I love their parrots, their wooden legs, their eye patches, and obviously their AAARGS! But I have never loved pirates more than the day they seized a fully laden supertanker off the coast of Somalia.
http://edition.cnn.com/2008/WORLD/africa/11/18/kenya.tanker.pirates/?iref=mpstoryview
We should have seen this coming. I blame Obama and his whole "Yes I can" philosophy. Suddenly even the pirates are thinking big. Six months ago these pirates were probably robbing convenience stores. After they saw Obama get elected president, they figured anything was possible.
The funny part is that they are probably right. No one is going to start shooting in the general direction of a supertanker (except pirates), and the pirates have an excellent track record for releasing hostages unharmed for a price. It looks like this scheme might work.
I wish I had seen the meeting where they first cooked up this supertanker plot. There must have been a whole lot of audacity of hope, and obviously some potent cannabis. I wonder if the other pirates laughed when one of them suggested the idea, or if it sounded like a good plan right from the start. And is there a Somalian pirate equivalent of the catch phrase "That's just crazy enough to work!"?
I have to wonder where this trend will stop. If you are hijacking supertankers, it can't be that much of a leap to complete the distribution chain and make some real money. Somewhere in Somalia a band of pirates is passing a bong and designing logos for their chain of gas stations. I can see it now: You get a free eye patch with every tank, and the price is always AAAARG!
Today only, all of your comments should incorporate AAAARG!
Votes: +10
Comments
Nov 21, 2008
From The Explainer, on Slate.com: http://www.slate.com/id/2205111/Enjoy.
Nov 21, 2008
AAARGS! You could see this coming, http://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forums/proposed-new-bailout-plan, a pirate bailout plan. You-ho-ho and a initial derivative placement! AAARGS!
0
Nov 20, 2008
AAAARG! I can't believe Michael Howlett, assistant director of the International Maritime Bureau in London, is ignorant enough to say "This is completely unprecedented," about Islamic piracy in Africa. Piracy has been a major industry in Northern Africa since before the US was born! He must have failed all History courses dealing with the Mediterranean and/or America. The US fought two "wars" against the "Barbary Coast" pirates. That is where the line "shores of Tripoli" comes from in the Marine Hymn. On the other hand, one man's pirate is another man's hero. One of America's greatest naval heroes (John Paul Jones) was considered a pirate by the Brits. You'd think an educated Brit working for the "International Maritime Bureau in London" would be a little better informed about pirates than some doofus reading a blog (I am referring to myself here). AAAARG!
+1
Nov 20, 2008
Truly, if the pirates were to secure the whole means of production, the citizens of Earth would be slave to AAAAAARGHonomics.
0
Nov 20, 2008
William Langewiesche has written an excellent book about contemporary pirates called, "The Outlaw Sea: A World of Freedom, Chaos, and Crime." This pirating has been going on for a while. Among the reasons it is successful; ships are so big that pirates can come on board, steal stuff, then leave without detection. Also, they want the ransom and almost always leave hostages unhurt and the ship undamaged. Ship owners usually pay the ransom which is a pittance compared to the cost of the ship and their overall business.
0
Nov 19, 2008
Indian warship!!Attack!!!!Wow, what's that thing coming toward us?
Ohh no......ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGG
http://www.cbc.ca/world/story/2008/11/19/pirate-somali.html?ref=rss
+1
Nov 19, 2008
AAARGS! With the global economy being so bad, it looks like the Indians are wanting to go after the pirate outsourcing market ("India navy sinks suspected pirate 'mother ship'" http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/27766333/?GT1=43001). AAARGS!
+1
Nov 19, 2008
I have to wonder if the pirating business is quite the lucrative venture that it appeared to be at first glance. . . since the Indian navy blew up the pirate ship and all the pirates.Arrrrrrr. . . that'll make you rethink your business plan.
+1
Nov 19, 2008
arrrgh-uably this kind of tactic really is quite lucrative to these pirates, and the booty was rich! the super tanker has to be worth a lot more than the oil, and it's all about hostages (the oil and ship) than anything else. they won't sell the oil or try to refine it. what they have is better than pieces of eight! and Moghadishu is the modern-day Tortuga, mates!an Indian warship happened onto the pirate "mother ship" and blasted it to jelly and sent it down to Davy Jones' locker, me hearties! not even Cap'n Jack Sparrow could have withstood the bombardment of the modern warship, but it seems some of the scurvy dogs managed to escape on a little RHIB boat that was tied to the stern. no one was made to walk the plank!
0
Nov 19, 2008
arrrgh-uably this kind of tactic really is quite lucrative to these pirates, and the booty was rich! the super tanker has to be worth a lot more than the oil, and it's all about hostages (the oil and ship) than anything else. they won't sell the oil or try to refine it. what they have is better than pieces of eight! and Moghadishu is the modern-day Tortuga, mates!an Indian warship happened onto the pirate "mother ship" and blasted it to jelly, me hearties! not even Cap'n Jack Sparrow could have withstood the bombardment of the modern warship, but it seems some of the scurvy dogs managed to escape on a little RHIB boat that was tied to the stern. no one was made to walk the plank!
+2
Nov 19, 2008
To get from supertanker to fuelling station they'll need a refinery. In the absence of any conveniantly located refineries to hijack, I'm an engineer, I'm sure I could knock something together for them (for a price, to be paid in gold dubloons and pieces of eight). Should be easier than normal, I doubt the Health & Safety inspectors will be round that often, which will remove several layers of hassle...Aaaaaarrrrrrgggggghhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!
-1
Nov 19, 2008
You can't blame Obama, he's not even officially President yet. It's still on Bush's watch, so blame him.... Arrghhhh!
-2
Nov 19, 2008
guys with so little imagination and sense of imagination like arbyisme are almost danterous.AAAARGH!
Nov 19, 2008
There was this awesome Caribbean guy I used to work with, had a mad beard and decorated himself with amazing egyptian jewelery, always with ancient historical significance. He was born and lived on on a boat for the first few years of his life coz his parents were Caribbean pirates, he has no country of origin. How utterly boring and ordinary does that make me feel? A LOT - that's how much. Anyway... In the spirit of all things piratey - YARR!
http://www.anirritatingtruth.blogspot.com
Nov 19, 2008
Not to many future for them pirates if they start attacking supertankers from petrol multinationals, those guys have hired vicious evil mercenaries precisely for that short of thing, that and securing deals with locals still living in the neolitic. But I propose a toast to the only ones that fight the real axis of evil, they will be masacred but thats the thing with the heroes of the working class, usually they never live to become despot tyrants!Thx again Scott for making me laugh on a cold morning at work!
best AAAAAAAAARGGGH...there ever was!
+2
Nov 19, 2008
- Right you are boys, let’s be a diggin now- How deep goes she, cap,n?
- Deep enoughs to cover a supertanker me lads, so bend ye backs to the task, whiles I draws up a map.
- Yaaaarrrr!!
- YYYaaaaaRRRR!!!!
- YARRRRRRR!!!
+1
Nov 19, 2008
“Right you are boys, let’s be a diggin’ nowâ€â€œHow deep goes she, cap,n?â€
“Deep enoughs to cover a supertanker me lads, so bend ye backs to the task, whiles I draws up a map.â€
“Yaaaarrrr!!
“YYYaaaaaRRRR!!!!â€
“YARRRRRRR!!!â€
Nov 19, 2008
Beatle Pirate! ( www.youtube.com/watch?v=pSIjlUMV6Is)Everyone, Scott, you and you're family, too, and the dog, singalong!
Oh! I'd like to be a pirate
A pirate's life for me
All my friends are pirates
And sail the B. B. sea
I've got a Jolly Roger
It's black and white and vast
So! Get out of your Skull and Crossbones
And I'll run it up your mast
With a yo-ho-ho
And a ha-ha-ha
And a ye-hee-hee-ha-ha-hum
With a yo-ho-ho
And a ya-ha-ha
And a yum-yum-yum-jum-jum
I've got a Jolly Roger
It's black and white and vast
So! Get out of your Skull and Crossbones
And I'll run it up your mast
Altogether! I'd like to be a pirate
A pirate's life for me
All my friends are pirates
And sail the B. B. sea
I've got a Jolly Roger
It's black and white and vast
So! Get out of your Skull and Crossbones
And I'll run it up your mast
With a yo-ho-ho
And a he-he-he
And a ye-hee-hee-ha-ha-hum
With a yo-ho-ho
And a ya-ha-ha
And a yum-yum-yum-jum-jum
I've got a Jolly Roger
It's black and white and vast
So! Get out of your Skull and Crossbones
And I'll run it up your mast
One more time! (repeat)
AAAAARRRRGGGGHHHH!
(can you post a Dilbert, Dogbert and George Harrison as pirates dancing on deck?)
Nov 19, 2008
I love the smell of burning pirates in the morning.AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHhhh!
