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When your brain registers happiness, it often sends a message to the muscles around your mouth to form a smile. But interestingly, it works both ways. Researchers have shown that forcing yourself to smile can make your brain feel happier. In humans, our cause and effect circuitry often works in both directions.

Another example is music. If you hear a new song at about the same time you're falling in love, that song can later become a trigger for your emotions. Your feelings of being in love probably helped the song sound better than normal when you first heard it, and years later the song can summon those same feelings in you.

There are lots of ways we can take advantage of these little triggers in our lives. My favorite example is that if I don't feel like exercising, I can often change that feeling simply by putting on my workout clothes and running shoes. My brain associates the feel-good chemistry of sports and exercise with the physical sensation that my athletic shoes have on my feet.

This leads me to today's topic: The Curiosity Seduction Hypothesis. We know that when two people are attracted they become intensely curious about the life and happenings of the other. In fact, the best way to know if someone has romantic interest in you is by paying attention to the questions that person asks. If someone asks you only a few typical questions, it's probably just polite conversation and nothing more. But if the curiosity starts extending to deeper questions, and more of them, that's a "tell" that something else is happening.

My hypothesis is that you can induce romantic or sexual interest in another person by exhibiting curiosity, even if the curiosity is faked. Since we know romantic interest generates curiosity, I would expect it to work in reverse as well. Pretending to be curious about the details of another person's feelings should cause that person to automatically form a positive feeling about you, including perhaps feelings of lust and romance.

Obviously this only works if the two people involved have some potential for chemistry in the first place. I wouldn't worry about falling in love with a banker who asks for your mother's maiden name to verify your password.

Do me a favor and try this method over the weekend to seduce someone new or to generate some action with your existing partner. If it doesn't work, the worst that can happen is that you will appear to be an interested and caring conversationalist.

If you report back on Monday that the technique worked, you will have earned your Moist Robot Reprogramming Certification, Level 1.
 
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Jul 11, 2012
I had a psych professor in college who provided significant evidence that this was a provable fact. Case in point: he proceeded to - sincerely - ask an entire class how they felt about topics like gambling, certain movies, dogs, etc. You could feel the tone in the room change. It was unbelievable. He sat back, point proven and said, "Please use this power for good. Not evil."
 
 
+13 Rank Up Rank Down
Jul 10, 2012
I tried it with my wife. I asked how her day went and who she'd met. She looked at me with that stony stare that women have and said 'If you think you're getting sex tonight - forget it!'
 
 
Jul 10, 2012
Are you testing how obviously logically flawed argument you can get away with?

Happiness causes me to smile --> Faking smiling tricks me to feel happy.
My romantic interest to A causes me to be curios about A --> My faked curiosity about A tricks A feel romantically interested in me?

How the hell does only one other commenter see logical failure in that? Faking curiosity should make you romantically interested about someone. Not cause someone else to get interested about you.


 
 
Jul 9, 2012
Moist Robot Reprogramming Certification as in managed to reprogram someone to love or as in managed to get reprogrammed by Scott Adams to try his antics?
 
 
Jul 9, 2012
By coincidence I am playing a cryptogram game on the ipad that includes a lot of quotes. A quote that came up today was from Dale Carnegie:

“You can make more friends in two months by becoming more interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get people interested in you”
 
 
+7 Rank Up Rank Down
Jul 8, 2012
So, does being called a stalker and threatened with a restraining order means I didn't quite get the process right?
 
 
Jul 8, 2012
But if I start faking curiosity towards the other person, wouldn't that make me fall in love?

In order to make the other person fall in love, I would have to make them be curious about me!
 
 
Jul 8, 2012
This topic was summed up by Dorothy Parker circa 1930 as "Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker".
 
 
Jul 7, 2012
I feel like their was a bigger message here, about how association can work both ways.

But let's broaden our horizons to more than just curiosity. What other responses would romantic interest generate that you can induce upon someone else through your behavior? Perhaps feelings of insecurity in the subject, or concern about you.

So in order to be sexy, you must inspire all three of these feelings by being interesting, a little intimidating, and brooding (in order of curiosity, insecurity, and concern).

So you need to act like Edward Cullen, basically. Maybe we should rename this theory to take out the word 'curiosity', so we don't only use that one emotion to get the girl/guy.

Scott, if you can add anything to this list, I would be more than happy to hear it.
 
 
Jul 7, 2012
I feel like their was a bigger message here, about how association can work both ways.

But let's broaden our horizons to more than just curiosity. What other responses would romantic interest generate that you can induce upon someone else through your behavior? Perhaps feelings of insecurity in the subject, or concern about you.

So in order to be sexy, you must inspire all three of these feelings by being interesting, a little intimidating, and brooding (in order of curiosity, insecurity, and concern).

So you need to act like Edward Cullen, basically. Maybe we should rename this theory to take out the word 'curiosity', so we don't only use that one emotion to get the girl/guy.

Scott, if you can add anything to this list, I would be more than happy to hear it.
 
 
Jul 7, 2012
I feel like their was a bigger message here, about how association can work both ways.

But let's broaden our horizons to more than just curiosity. What other responses would romantic interest generate that you can induce upon someone else through your behavior? Perhaps feelings of insecurity in the subject, or concern about you.

So in order to be sexy, you must inspire all three of these feelings by being interesting, a little intimidating, and brooding (in order of curiosity, insecurity, and concern).

So you need to act like Edward Cullen, basically. Maybe we should rename this theory to take out the word 'curiosity', so we don't only use that one emotion to get the girl/guy.

Scott, if you can add anything to this list, I would be more than happy to hear it.
 
 
Jul 7, 2012
I feel like their was a bigger message here, about how association can work both ways.

But let's broaden our horizons to more than just curiosity. What other responses would romantic interest generate that you can induce upon someone else through your behavior? Perhaps feelings of insecurity in the subject, or concern about you.

So in order to be sexy, you must inspire all three of these feelings by being interesting, a little intimidating, and brooding (in order of curiosity, insecurity, and concern).

So you need to act like Edward Cullen, basically. Maybe we should rename this theory to take out the word 'curiosity', so we don't only use that one emotion to get the girl/guy.

Scott, if you can add anything to this list, I would be more than happy to hear it.
 
 
Jul 7, 2012
Unfortunately the extent of my curiosity runs only as far as

"So, what do you look like naked and sat on my face?"
 
 
0 Rank Up Rank Down
Jul 7, 2012
These little psycholigical tricks never work out in the long run.

If I have to pretend to like someone (/be interested in her) and so make them like me, I probably didn't like them in the first place. Then some kind of relationship begins with a person that I'm not really interested in.

Ofcourse if you're just interestes in casual s e x, or if you want to cheat someone with some shifty business, this is good advice, provided you're a good actor and/or your counterpart is naive.
 
 
Jul 7, 2012
I find women who inquire about me, my interest and life are not just interested in me, but are women who are generally more intelligent overall. People at times find me as an enigma of sorts to begin with, And I typically become more appealing after a inquisition.I have also had women take interest in me with out question, and usually their drunk and more interested in primitive monkey sexual interaction...

From what I have experienced in my observations. I find that people who make decisions "not just dating" but decisions in general after a inquisition are usually more intelligent than people who don't make the effort to question. It takes work to think and question, and lazy minded people don't like work, so they make decisions based on confirmation biases and stereotypes...

I will do a many inquisition this weekend...

I also find that the only questioning in bars is usually... "Are you drunk? Im drunk, hey lets go breed!

No thinking whats so ever....
 
 
Jul 6, 2012
Wow. OK, not every one of Scott's ideas is as revolutionary as he makes them sound, but come on. Really? Pretending to be interested in someone might make them like you? Really?

Really?
 
 
Jul 6, 2012
I think this works across all sexual lines. When I meet a new person, say at a party, and that person spends all his/her time asking ME questions about myself, I find I go away thinking that THEY are really interesting people, even though I haven't actually learned a thing about them. Kind of like your advice to tell your boss your idea was really his, and he told you about it last week. He immediately loves the idea, even though it's his first time hearing it. Or using a person's name in a sentence, over and over.

People like themselves, and if other people like you (show interest in you) they must be alright...
 
 
+10 Rank Up Rank Down
Jul 6, 2012
Two anecdotes from my psych class:

1 - If you want someone to like you, ask for something small from them, such as borrowing a pencil. By lending you a pencil (or another small token of aid), that person will immediately have more positive feelings about you, because their brain thinks they wouldn't help out someone they don't like.

2 - Your body absolutely does interpret emotion based on physiological response. This is why men should take dates to scary movies. The scary parts of the movie will cause a physical response to fear, such as sweaty palms and a faster heart rate. These are also the same responses to sexual arousal, so, the body may misinterpret the feelings of fear as those of being aroused.
 
 
+11 Rank Up Rank Down
Jul 6, 2012
Nothing new here. Many guys have pretended to be intensely curious about an attractive female's collection of animal figurines in the hopes that it would lead to something more.

Results thus far -- the Female Moist Robot's Programming may be beyond our current comprehension. :)
 
 
+13 Rank Up Rank Down
Jul 6, 2012
If it only was that easy ...

If you are a nerd, you remain a nerd, even if you ask nerdy curiosity questions about the other person's life.

Compared to that theory, alcohol seems a way more successful strategy to me
 
 
 
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