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Office relocation.

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"Office relocation." "Some cubicles are slightly less desirable than others." "For example, your new cubicle is below an air duct so it is sometimes cooler than the area around it." "I asked the facilities people to chip out the penguin as soon as possible."

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Office relocation.

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"It looks like an ordinary piece of paper, but I added this finger holder." "Now when I wander the hallways looking busy I can totally rest my hand." "Working hard?" "Not any more!"

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"The expense cutters award goes to Wally for drastically lowering his cell phone bill." "Wally, would you like to say a few words to the group?" "I lost my phone last month. Hey, thanks for the hundred dollars!"

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It's time to go power shopping.

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"Ted, you're going to experience an involuntary separation from payroll." "I'm fired." "No-o-o-o. It's just that you won't be part of the payroll system." "And you're not allowed to touch anything."

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The smokers in this building take hundreds of trips outside to smoke everyday.

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Our CEO is giving a speech at the conference you're attending.

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"I need your approval to.." "... Be exhausted, bored, stiff, headachy, annoyed and constipated for the next three days." "Also known as 'business travel.'" "I must be traveling right now!"