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Ted Is Doing A Terrible Job

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Ted Is Doing A Terrible Job - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 10, 2017's comic on:


Tags #talking, #conversation, #boring, #annoy, #quitting, #boredom

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Boss: Ted is doing a terrible job. Catbert: Maybe you should talk to him. Boss: What should I say? Catbert: It doesn't matter. Five minutes of listening to you will make him want to quit. Boss: That's crazy enough to work. Catbert: You've only been here for two minutes and my tail is asleep.

Nothing Else To Talk About

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Nothing Else To Talk About - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 11, 2016's comic on:


Tags #personality, #boring, #bored, #conversation, #small talk

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Man: Do you want to know how we would have handled this situation at my old job? Dilbert: No. Dilbert: Nothing would interest me less. Man: My only other topics of conversation are my health problems and TV shows you haven't seen. Dilbert: I stand corrected.

Men Who Do The Driving

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Men Who Do The Driving - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 28, 2016's comic on:


Tags #dating, #driving, #Men, #conversation

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Woman: I like a man who always offers to do the driving on dates? Dilbert: Like Uber? Woman: But less expensive, and no waiting. Dilbert; So you're saying I'm better than Uber? Woman: You would be if you didn't talk.

Asok Is An Introvert

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Asok Is An Introvert - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 23, 2016's comic on:


Tags #introversion, #introvert, #loneliness, #social situation

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Dilbert: Do you have plans for the weekend? Asok: No, I"m an introvert. I'll probably experience despair and loneliness while being jealous of people who have substance abuse problems. Dilbert: Yeah, me too. Asok: This conversation is dragging on too long.

How Conversations Work

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How Conversations Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 16, 2016's comic on:


Tags #antisocial, #conversation, #distraction, #phone, #social, #technology

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Dilbert: The weather will be good this weekend. Alice: Stop right there. Your proposed topic of conversation is far below the level of entertainment I can get from my phone. Dilbert: I don't know how conversations work. Dogbert: You're interrupting my phone time.

Just What She Thought

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Just What She Thought - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 15, 2016's comic on:


Tags #cell phone, #distraction, #technology, #conversation, #social interaction, #antisocial

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Woman: I'd better check this. It's just what I thought. Dilbert: What did you think? Woman: I thought I would enjoy my phone more than talking to you.

Phone Better Than Human

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 Phone Better Than Human  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 14, 2016's comic on:


Tags #technology, #distraction, #human, #conversation

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Alan: Everything went wrong for me this week. I have problems... all kinds of problems. Dilbert: For the zillionth time in a row, my phone is more fun than talking to a human.

Biggest Risk To Happiness

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Biggest Risk To Happiness  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 27, 2016's comic on:


Tags #happiness, #Advice, #complaining, #conversation

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Wally: The biggest risk to your happiness involves listening to other people. When they aren't trying to make you work, they're complaining. Asok: I hate that. Wally: Shhh. Don't talk.

Political Opinions Only Make It Worse

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Political Opinions Only Make It Worse - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 31, 2016's comic on:


Tags #intelligence, #speaking, #conversation, #Politics

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Man: Did you watch any of the debates? Dilbert: Stop right there. I'm barely clinging to the illusion that you're competent at your job. Don't talk about politics or it will only get worse. Man: Did you know China caused climate change by hogging the sun? Dilbert: And there it is.

Longest Date Ever

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Longest Date Ever - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 28, 2016's comic on:


Tags #dating, #relationships, #Women, #Men, #attraction, #record, #conversation

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Dilbert: My date lasted 53 minutes. Dogbert: That's your longest yet. Was she trapped in any way, such as under rubble? Dilbert: Nope! Dogbert: Wow. How'd you do it? Dilbert: I didn't talk for the first 49 minutes.