Search Results for "proud"

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 01, 2013's comic on:


Tags #competition (psychology), #thinking

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: I'm proud to announce the winner in the CEO's technology challenge. Two weeks ago, I challenged you to come up with innovative ideas for getting fresh water to Elbonia. The winner is someone named Wally. Wally's idea for bringing fresh water to Elbonia is... "in a box." That's the best one? Boss: We only had one entry. CEO: I hate your bald guts. Wally: I get that a lot. If you need me, I'll be in my cubicle thinking up award-winning ideas.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 10, 2014's comic on:


Tags #deception, #executives

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: You should be proud that we beat the earnings that analysts expected. Dilbert: Why should we be proud that analysts are bad at making estimates? CEO: Those bad estimated don't happen on their own. I had to mislead them. Asok: I'm proud of you.

Incompetent Employee Budget Only

Thank you for voting.
Incompetent Employee Budget Only - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 25, 2014's comic on:


Tags #incompetence, #budget, #budgets, #catch-22

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I only have enough in the budget to hire an employee who is incompetent half of the time. But if I don't use the budget, I will lose those funds next year. Employee: And I am proud to say that I'm 75% competent. Boss: I wish I could afford that.

Ceo Is On Nine Boards

Thank you for voting.
Ceo Is On Nine Boards - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 30, 2015's comic on:


Tags #board, #board member, #power, #bragging, #focus, #attention

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: I am proud to say I serve as a board member for nine corporations. Dilbert; Your lack of focus shows disregard for your fiduciary responsibilities. CEO: Can someone fire this guy for me? I don't remember what company I'm at.

Gawful Media Company

Thank you for voting.
Gawful Media Company - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 10, 2016's comic on:


Tags #merger, #acquisition, #gawker, #morals, #executives, #decision, #information

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: The board is proud to announce that we will be acquiring the Gawful Media Company. Dilbert: Are you aware that Gawful is so despicable that a crime bill has their name on it? CEO: Hey, don't blame me. I told the board that someone should Google them.