Search Results for "lazy"
Share September 14, 2004's comic on:
"My secretary is off, and I need to make copies of this..." "Oh, I get it! You immediately ask the only woman in the department to do it! #!%**$!!" "Lazy #!%*$*!!#" "I was going to ask where the copy machine is, but this works, too."
Share March 21, 1999's comic on:
The Boss brings a Big Dumb Guy to Alice's desk. He says, "Alice, I'd like you to work with this big dumb guy." The Boss continues, "He doesn't know he's dumb. So he'll tell people you're dumb if you ever disagree." The Boss: "He's also lazy and a habitual liar." Alice shouts, "Then why do you let him work here?!" The Boss explains, "He has an excellent track record. No one knows why." In front of the Boss and Alice, the Big Dumb Guy bends over and picks up the document that Alice was working on from her desk. Big Dumb Guy shows Alice's document to the Boss. Big Dumb Guy says, "Look what I just did." The Boss responds, "Excellent work." Alice is flabbergasted. The Boss tries to console Alice, who is furious, with "Remember Alice, you're never too old to learn."
Share June 06, 1999's comic on:
Dilbert stands at the boss' desk. The boss says, "e-mail two copies to me when you're done." Dilbert says, "Two copies? It's e0mail." The boss says, "So?" Dilbert says, "Never mind. I'll e-mail two copies." The boss says, "and fax a copy in green paper for my files." Dilbert says, "Green? It's a fax!" The boss walks Dilbert out of his office and says, "And bring me a hard copy of the internet so I can do some serious surfing." Dilbert begins to faint in the doorway. Dilbert thinks, "Motivation.... gonve.. losing consciousness.." Dilber joins the pile of passed out employess by the boss' door. The boss thinks, "How did I end up with all the lazy employees?"
Share April 22, 2005's comic on:
Hello. My crashinbox computer keeps freezing up. "There are 25 possible fixes but they must be tried in every combination." "That's 625 things I'd have to try with no guarantee that any of it will work." "So you're saying you're lazy."
Share May 11, 2005's comic on:
The New Employee "Maybe if I make a friend at work it will reduce my stress hump." "I must choose carefully because I will be judged by the people I associate with." "Hi. I'm the new guy." "The lazy people have found each other."
Share November 22, 2005's comic on:
Welcome to my seminar on dealing with difficult coworkers. "Difficult coworkers generally fall into one of these groups." LAZY MEAN SMART CRAZY "The only way to deal with them is to quit your job and become a syndicated cartoonist." "Thanks for coming."
Share February 08, 2006's comic on:
I'm too busy to learn anything about the projects I'm managing. "I barely have enough time to make critical decisions about them." "Maybe you're lazy and stupid." "Let's go down to the pond and throw rocks at the ducks."
Share March 23, 2013's comic on:
The Boss: I bought a robot to replace you. All it does is drink coffee and look at inappropriate websites. The boss: Did I forget anything? Wally: No, I not a complicated man.