Search Results for "motivation"

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Nanorobots In Wally Slow Down

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Nanorobots In Wally Slow Down - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 29, 2015's comic on:


Tags #laziness, #work ethic, #technology, #robot, #nanobot, #motivation

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Catbert: The nanobots we injected into your bloodstream to make you a better employee are slowing down. Your blood is demotivating the nanorobots and making them useless. You're killing them! Gaaa!!! It's a massacre in there! Wally: They had it coming.

Wally Thinks Twice As Hard

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Wally Thinks Twice As Hard - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 26, 2015's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #motivation, #trick, #deception, #excuse, #lazy, #energy, #con

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Wally: I'm working twice as hard as ever before. Most of it is happening inside my head. But trust me, my brain is working double-time. Boss: Um... that's great. Wally: Obviously, I need to work fewer hours because of the energy drain.

Wally Engineers Something

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Wally Engineers Something - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 09, 2015's comic on:


Tags #genius, #brilliant, #idea, #thinking, #printer, #technology, #invention, #medicine, #deception, #motivation, #innovation, #laziness

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Dilbert: Did you design our robot's 3-D pill printer? Wally: Yup. Dilbert: The design is brilliant, except for the part where the pill drops out of the robot's butt. Why are you suddenly brilliant? Wally: Never had a reason before.

Wally Puts It On His List

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Wally Puts It On His List - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 23, 2015's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #priorities, #work, #motivation, #teamwork

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Woman: Can you do that for me? Wally: I'll put it on my list. Woman: Near the top? Wally: Depends on your frame of reference. Woman: Should I give up now? Wally: Quitter.

False Sense Of Urgency

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False Sense Of Urgency - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 02, 2016's comic on:


Tags #guest artist, #managers, #motivation, #personality disorder, #sociopath, #strategy, #john glynn

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Boss: I don't think I'm doing enough to create a false sense of urgency. Catbert: Are you still a sociopath? Boss: That's the easy part. Catbert: Now add a meaningless deadline and some fear.

Being The Best

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Being The Best - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 05, 2016's comic on:


Tags #Advice, #failure, #guest artist, #motivation, #pep talk, #success, #john glynn

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CEO: The secret to success is finding one thing at which you can be the best. Dilbert: What are you the best at? CEO: I'm the best at motivating people. Dilbert: Yay! I can't wait for that to start.

Try Not Being Boring

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Try Not Being Boring - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 08, 2016's comic on:


Tags #motivation, #inspiration, #frustration, #bored, #boring, #powerpoint, #meeting, #obliviousness, #eric scott

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CEO: I don't think my motivational messages are getting through to the employees. I can't make them pay attention to anything. Catbert: Have you tried not being boring? CEO: Good idea. I'll make fifty slides of pure excitement.

Be Like Entrpreneurs

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Be Like Entrpreneurs  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 11, 2016's comic on:


Tags #motivation, #inspiration, #control, #entrepreneur, #risk

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Boss: We need to disrupt our entire industry. And we need to move quickly. But check with me before you do anything. I want you to think like entrepreneurs, but not like the brave ones. People: Can do.

Who Alan Works For

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 Who Alan Works For - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 13, 2016's comic on:


Tags #threat, #motivation, #fear, #work ethic

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Alice: If you do what I tell you to do, I will nominate you for employee of the year. If not, I will spend the rest of my days spreading rumors about you. Terrible, terrible rumors. Dilbert: Hey, Alan. Who do you work for these days? Alan: Whoever scares me the most.

Accused Of Forgery

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Accused Of Forgery - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 10, 2016's comic on:


Tags #motivation, #performance, #forgery, #pessimism, #giving up, #resistance

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Catbert: You stand accused of forging an expense approval from the head of Marketing. Your malfeasance caused the project to finish on time and under budget. Next time, just give up and lose hope like everyone else. Dilbert: Will do.