Search Results for "laziness"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 23, 2014's comic on:


Tags #trust, #holidays, #work ethic, #laziness, #deception

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Wally: Is it okay if I telecommute on "Bring Your Kid To Work" Day? I'll show my kid how I work from home. Boss: How would I know you were working? Wally: What??!! That is exactly the sort of distrust that corrodes the motivation of employees! How can I feel good about my job in this toxic atmosphere? Boss: Okay, okay. You can work from home on "Bring Your Kid To Work" Day. Dilbert: You don't have a kid. Wally: I hear they ruin your naps.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 28, 2014's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #multitasking

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Coworker: Three months. That's how long I have been waiting for you to do your part of the project. Wally: Perhaps you don't realize how many projects I'm on. Coworker: Have you done any work for the other projects? Wally: That would defeat the point of having multiple projects.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 03, 2014's comic on:


Tags #devil, #demon, #menace, #fear, #spoon, #cereal, #laziness

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Phil: I am Phil, The Prince of Insufficient Light. I got a report that you wished bad karma upon your co-workers. Dilbert: You would put off a more menacing vibe if you didn't have leftover cereal in your pitchspoon. Phil: I was really hungry and I didn't feel like emptying the dishwasher. Dilbert: We've all been there.

Wally Does Ceo Job For 10%

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Wally Does Ceo Job For 10% - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 19, 2014's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #deception, #money, #wages

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Dogbert the CEO. Dogbert: I will give you 10% of my annual pay if you do 100% of my job for me. 10% of my pay as CEO is still a lot of money. Wally: I'll do it. I'll give you 10% of what he's paying me if you do 100% of his work plus mine. It's still a lot of money. Asok: I'm in!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 14, 2014's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #frustration, #hard work, #respect

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Wally: What's it like to work hard? I'm curious because the reward for hard work seems to be identical to the reward for pretending to work. It seems as if it would be demotivating to work so hard for no incremental benefit. If I had to pick one word to describe my day, it would be "relaxing." But you took the harder path, and for that, you have my respect. Alice: I don't want the respect of a loser! Wally: If it makes you feel any better, I don't actually respect hard work.

Wally's Document Doesn't Open

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Wally's Document Doesn't Open - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 01, 2014's comic on:


Tags #laziness, #technology, #jargon

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Boss: I couldn't open the document you sent with your project update. Wally: Try erasing your hard disk and reinstalling the operating system. Boss: I guess I don't need it that badly. Wally: After all the work I put into making that document?

Wally Working In The Cloud

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Wally Working In The Cloud - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 08, 2014's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #deception, #the cloud

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Wally: If you need me, I'll be in the cloud fixing a software issue. There's no cell coverage in the cloud, so it might seem to you as if I am at home doing nothing. If you need me, I'll be at home doing nothing. Dilbert: Why would anyone need you?

Wally's Air Bag

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Wally's Air Bag - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 10, 2014's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #air bags

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Wally: I added air bags to my underpants to avoid accidental assignments. Boss: Hey, Wally, I need you to... Maybe I'll ask someone else. Wally: The system works!

Wally Uses Misdirection

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Wally Uses Misdirection - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 11, 2014's comic on:


Tags #criticism, #anger, #work ethic, #laziness

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Wally: I would love to help you, Alice, but Dilbert says everything you are doing is misguided. Alice: What? I will whip him to death with his own intestines! Wally: Can you either do that quietly or wait until after my nap time?

Wally's Analysis Is No Longer Needed

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Wally's Analysis Is No Longer Needed - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 12, 2014's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #laziness

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Wally: Here's the analysis you asked me to do. Coworker: Oops. I forgot to tell you, I don't need this anymore. Wally: What? I did all of that work for nothing? Coworker: Wait... this is nothing but... gibberish. Wally: That is a separate issue.