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"At the current rate of inflation, with no raises or promotions..." "Our net worth at retirement will be...a shopping cart full of aluminum cans." "We'd better do something." "I'm going shopping before all the good carts are gone."

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"Dogbert's Body Language Update" "Are you hampered by the limits of conventional body language?" "I can help." "How can you politely tell somebody he's babbling?" "Babble, Babble." "Remove the offender's watch while he babbles." "Babble." "Smash the watch with your daily planner." "Babble." "Whack!" "This won't stop the babble, but it will feel real good for a minute." "Babble." "Mmm." "Use this position to signal your surrender to the babble." "Babble." "Next week - the self-Heimlich manuever and the Kervorkian dodge." "Babble."

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All of our projects are floundering. I decided on a bold new strategy.

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We'll need a name for the newly reorganized department.

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"These constant reorganizations do not take into consideration the needs of the employees." "I've decided to use you for spare parts. Your liver will be sent to Jose in accounting, immediately." "Jose has a bad liver?" "No, but why take a chance?"

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Sometimes I think these constant reorganizations are just excuses for getting rid of unwanted employees.

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