Search Results for "nugatory work"

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

Notice: Too many results returned for your search. Displaying the first 1000 most relevant results.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 11, 2014's comic on:


Tags #engineers, #work ethic

View Transcript

Transcript

Woman: What kind of engineer are you? Wally: I'm a personal lifestyle engineer. I engineer my career to achieve an ideal balance of work and leisure. Woman: How many hours per week do you work? Wally: I don't think you know what "ideal" means.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 01, 2014's comic on:


Tags #cruelty, #work ethic

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: My job in Human Resources is to instill in you a permanent feeling of inadequacy. Your only hope for feeling good about yourself is to work feverishly to boos company profits. If you work all weekend for free, I am willing to call you adequate on a temporary basis. Dilbert: I'll take it.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 03, 2014's comic on:


Tags #workaholic, #rehab, #work ethic, #laziness

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: If I become a workaholic, will the company pay for rehab? Boss: What would workaholics rehab look like? Wally: I hope it involves getting paid while doing no work. Boss: That's what you do now. Wally: At rehab I think they do your laundry for you.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 08, 2014's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #Family, #priorities, #husbands

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Carol, I know it isn't easy balancing your work duties and your family. So I thought it would help if I trash-talk your family. That way you won't feel so guilty when you ignore them to do my busywork. I'll start with your husband. Carol: Don't bother. I got that one covered.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 09, 2014's comic on:


Tags #high five, #high fives, #human resources, #work ethic, #managers

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: I'm getting complaints that you've been trash-talking employees' families so they'll spend more time at work. I stopped by to give you a high-five from Human Resources. Your aim is terrible. Boss: The first one was practice~

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 26, 2014's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #trickery, #deception, #email, #iq, #intelligence, #insulting

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Studies show that continually checking email lowers your functional I.Q. You advised me to "work smarter," so I plan to ignore all of your email from now on. Boss: What if I text you instead? Wally: That's the sort of question that one asks after checking email too often. Boss: Did you just insult me? Wally: That answer is in your email. Boss: Where is it? I don't see any email from you. But I see six new emails that look important. What were we talking about. Wally: You were complimenting me on my efficiency.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 18, 2014's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #productivity, #deception

View Transcript

Transcript

Temporary Robot Boss. Robot: My sensors detect no work coming from this cubicle. Wally: That's because I have been working on an engineering problem in my head for five years. Robot: Are you almost done? Wally: I was, but you just made me forget all of it.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 23, 2014's comic on:


Tags #trust, #holidays, #work ethic, #laziness, #deception

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Is it okay if I telecommute on "Bring Your Kid To Work" Day? I'll show my kid how I work from home. Boss: How would I know you were working? Wally: What??!! That is exactly the sort of distrust that corrodes the motivation of employees! How can I feel good about my job in this toxic atmosphere? Boss: Okay, okay. You can work from home on "Bring Your Kid To Work" Day. Dilbert: You don't have a kid. Wally: I hear they ruin your naps.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 28, 2014's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #multitasking

View Transcript

Transcript

Coworker: Three months. That's how long I have been waiting for you to do your part of the project. Wally: Perhaps you don't realize how many projects I'm on. Coworker: Have you done any work for the other projects? Wally: That would defeat the point of having multiple projects.

Wally Does Ceo Job For 10%

Thank you for voting.
Wally Does Ceo Job For 10% - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 19, 2014's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #deception, #money, #wages

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert the CEO. Dogbert: I will give you 10% of my annual pay if you do 100% of my job for me. 10% of my pay as CEO is still a lot of money. Wally: I'll do it. I'll give you 10% of what he's paying me if you do 100% of his work plus mine. It's still a lot of money. Asok: I'm in!