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Ceo Compensation

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Ceo Compensation - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 24, 2015's comic on:


Tags #money, #worth, #salary, #wages, #fairness, #fair, #pay, #expenses, #saving, #rich people, #executives

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Dilbert: I just saw your net worth on the Internet. What's this meeting about anyway? CEO: It's about keeping expenses down. Dilbert: More for you? CEO: That's not the spin I was going to put on it.

Ceo's Yacht

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Ceo's Yacht - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 25, 2015's comic on:


Tags #hypocrisy, #money, #salary, #wages, #net worth, #rich people, #yacht, #obliviousness, #saving, #cost

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CEO: We must learn to do more with less. Alice: You own a yacht that has an 18-hole golf course, and a landing strip for your jet, and its own zip code. CEO: I got a good deal on that. Alice: That's what the idiot that buys it form you will say, too.

Asok Negotiates With Boss

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Asok Negotiates With Boss - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 10, 2016's comic on:


Tags #compensation, #haggle, #money, #negotiating, #negotiation, #obliviousness, #salary, #trick, #eric scott

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Asok: I demand a ten-million-dollar raise! Boss: Nice try! Every idiot knows that's your opening offer to set an anchor. Asok: I will settle for half of it. Boss: You'll take 30 percent of that, and not a penny more!

Boss Is Bad Negotiator

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Boss Is Bad Negotiator - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 11, 2016's comic on:


Tags #haggle, #money, #negotation, #negotiating, #raise, #salary, #trick, #eric scott

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Asok: I just learned that our boss is a bad negotiator. Wally: How bad? Asok: I just negotiated a 3.3-million-dollar raise for myself. And I want 80 percent of the raises you two get because I told you. Dilbert and Wally: 75 percent is our final offer!

Asok Meets His Equal

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Asok Meets His Equal - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 14, 2016's comic on:


Tags #accuse, #label, #racist, #sexist, #negotiation, #clever, #outsmart, #money, #salary

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Asok: I love being the best negotiator in the entire department. Alice: You're not. Asok: Are you being racist? Alice: Are you being sexist? Asok: I have met my equal. Alice: Tell your equal I said hi when you pull your head out of it.

New Hire Makes More

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New Hire Makes More - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 13, 2017's comic on:


Tags #wages, #salary, #compensation, #fairness, #negotiation, #confrontation

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Dilbert: I just found out that the new hire makes more than I do. Boss: It isn't my fault that you're a terrible negotiator. Dilbert: I don't like confrontation. Boss: I know. It saves me a lot of money. Shoo!

Logical Reasons For Learning To Negotiate

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Logical Reasons For Learning To Negotiate  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 10, 2017's comic on:


Tags #negotiating, #persuasion, #catch-22, #argument

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Dilbert: I can't persuade my boss to let me take a class on how to negotiate. Asok: Try giving him logical reasons. He'll respond to that. Dilbert: And then I would be able to negotiate for a higher salary. Boss: Pass.

Virus Gives Everyone A Raise

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Virus Gives Everyone A Raise  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 07, 2017's comic on:


Tags #virus, #infection, #computer, #malware, #morals, #salary

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Boss: The Elbonian virus in our network just gave ever employee an ten percent raise. You have to get rid of the virus! Dilbert: If the Elbonian software is giving me a raise, and you're trying to sop it, wouldn't that make you the virus?