Dilbert sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "Give me a final design for Project Caribou by Tuesday." Dilbert replies, "That's Wally's project." The Boss says, "I know, but I'm thinking about it now and Wally isn't in the room." The Boss says, "Tell Wally it's your project now." Dilbert says, "Do you see this thimble? I keep my morale in it."
"Our project is six months behind schedule."
"Meanwhile, our technology has become obsolete and the users' requirements have changed."
"Let's stubbornly plod along and deliver the useless product that was originally requested."
"That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard!"
"We should restart every time something changes. That way we'll never be held accountable for results!"
"You losers can work it out alone. I heard there's a job opening on project Caribou."
"Next on the agenda: our weekly team-building excercise."
"We need more staff for prject Cribou.' "No. You're thinking of project Caribbean." "Caribou is like project muskrat but with lower P.R.O.R.C." "P.R.O.R.C?" "Projected return on research capital." "Is muskrat the enterprise software project?" "Um... No... That would be project muskrat." "Cancel project musk ox, move the staff over to project zebra, delay panda and sdquirrel and give me a status report on probosics monkey." "We don't have any projects with those names." "How's that my fault?"