Search Results for "Feature Creep"
Share February 01, 1996's comic on:
Dogbert stands on an air traffic control panel. He says to the Boss, "Thanks to my leadership, the new air traffic control system is designed on time and under budget." Dogbert continues, "I had to cut a few corners. This big radar-looking thing is a wall clock. And most of the buttons are glued on." The Boss says, "It looks like it might be um . . . dangerous." Dogbert says angrily, "Great . . . I finish early and what do I get: 'feature creep.'"
Share August 16, 2005's comic on:
Topper Versus the Feature Creep "We need to add a keyword search function." "That's nothing!" "It should also search in different languages including Friulian, Kataang, Horpa and Wagi." "I like your style." "That's nothing! I want to marry you in a civil union."
Share February 21, 2017's comic on:
Man: Wally, I need you to add a feature to the legacy system while we wait for the new software to go live. Wally: My job is to prevent people such as you from adding features to our legacy system. Man: But it's my job to make you do it. Wally: One of us has a terrible job.
Share February 22, 2017's comic on:
Tina: How long would it take to add that feature to the legacy system? Wally: That depends. When will the new system replace the legacy system? Tina: In six months. Wally: The new feature would take seven months.
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Share February 09, 2011's comic on:
Wally says, "I got your text message and I burped the grope plow armistice as you requested." Dilbert says, "Maybe you should turn off the auto-correction feature on your phone." Wally says, "If the weather holds, I'll flail the rude fresco tomorrow."
Share April 08, 2012's comic on:
Tina: Wally, do you want to go to lunch? Wally: No, thanks. I"m a digisexual now. Tina: What: Wally: I'm no longer attracted to people. I only like technology. People creep me out. You're basically a delivery system for viruses, germs, and unreasonable favor requests. I'm willing to take a picture of you, but that's as far as I'll go. Tina: This is the most disturbing conversation I've ever had. Wally: Thank goodness for Photoshop.
Share October 28, 1998's comic on:
Caption: Dogbert the consultant. Dogbert stands on the conference table. Dogbert holds a pointer. Dogbert says, "Our target market is the gullible moron segment." Dogbert points at a television. Dogbert says, "Our commercials will feature an actor who seems sincere." The actor on the TV says, "I care about the rain forest... and you." A couple sits on the couch and watches TV. The voice from the television says, "I like kittens... and you." The man says, "Wow.. we made it into his top two."
Share June 30, 1996's comic on:
Dilbert and Dogbert sit at a table. Dilbert holds a device and says, "I call my invention the D-Chip Television Filter." Dogbert says, "I feel safer already." Dilbert explains, "It screens out any show with violence." Dogbert replies, "There goes the news, sports and dramas." Dilbert says, "It also gets rid of shows that feature dishonesty or sexual innuendos." Dogbert says, "Goodbye comedy and commercials." Dilbert says, "Let's hook it up." Dilbert sits on the couch holding the remote control and Dogbert sits on the backrest. Dilbert looks at the television and says, "All we're getting is weather reports." The newscaster says, "A huge tornado ripped through a . . ." There is a beep and then only static. Dilbert says, "It works! The evil can't get to us now, Dogbert." Dogbert says, "Unhook that #!*% thing or I'll rip off your leg and beat you to death with it."
Share April 03, 1999's comic on:
Dilbert walks with a dark haired women. She says, "I never told my last boyfriend what a despicable creep he was." She grabs on to the front of Dilbert's shirt and says, "But you'll pay for his crimes and pay dearly!!" Dilbert looks mad and says, "Why don't you call him and tell him how you feel?" She says, "I have a date with him at ten o'clock tonight."