Dogbert sits on his pillow thinking, "Sometimes I think gravity is only an illusion." Dogbert thinks, "Maybe other great thinkers realized gravity is mental and were thus freed of its restrictions." Dogbert thinks, "Which could explain why all the smart people have apparently been flung into space." Dilbert enters and says, "It's time for 'Wheel of Fortune.'"
Dilbert sits at a table and yells as a test tube flies out of his hands, "It works!! My anti-gravity formula works!!!" Dilbert continues, "If I drink it, I'll be able to fly! I'll be famous. People will shower me with praise and admiration!!" Dilbert sits on the wall over the television and says to Dogbert, "Notice anything?" Dogbert replies, "A pathetic bid for attention?"
Dilbert sits on the wall and says to Dogbert, "My anti-gravity formula is the greatest discovery of this century!!" Dilbert looks down at Dogbert and says, "Just think of the benefits to society!!" Dogbert says, "You mean, after you float away?"
Dilbert floats through the house with a propeller strapped to his back. He says into the phone, "CBS News? Yes, I'd like to call a press conference to announce my anti-gravity discovery . . ." Dilbert says into the telephone, "Science isn't news?! But you did that investigative report on suntan lotion last year . . ." Dilbert says, "No, I don't think I could do the interview in a string bikini."
Dilbert floats in mid-air with a propeller attached to his back. He says into the phone, "Hello, ABC News? I've discovered an anti-gravity formula." Dilbert continues, "What?! It's not newsworthy?!" Dogbert says, "Tell him it lets you lose weight without exercising." Dilbert covers the telephone receiver and asks, "Isn't that misleading and unethical?" Dogbert replies, "There's a fine line between marketing and grand theft."
Dilbert floats through the house thinking, "Dogbert wasn't even impressed by my anti-gravity formula." Dilbert thinks, "Uh-oh, I feel a sneeze coming . . ." Dilbert's sneeze propels him through the ceiling. Dogbert stands on a ladder under Dilbert's feet and says, "I guess we won't be going out for burritos anytime soon."
Dilbert floats through the air with a propeller strapped to his back. He thinks, "My anti-gravity formula should really impress the guys at work." Wally says, "I built a bird house this weekend." Dilbert says, "I conquered gravity." Another man says, "I taught myself to hum."
Dilbert reads a document and says, "Dogbert, I sold the rights to my anti-gravity invention. I get to keep half of the 'net.'" Dilbert says, "I wonder what 'net' means." Dogbert responds, "Net is what you land in after you find out you get no money and jump off a ledge." Dilbert asks, "What if there is no net?" Dogbert replies, "It's gross."
Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dilbert says, "I sold my anti-gravity patent to a company who wants to bring the benefits to the world." A television commercial shows an old woman with sagging breasts in the "before" picture and the same woman with upturned breasts in the "after" picture. The announcer asks, "Tired of sagging skin?" The announcer continues, "Get the patented 'Dilbert Anti-Gravity Beauty Formula!'" Dogbert watches the tv advertisement and says, "You must be so proud."
"No, 'C' is a computer language, not the grade for my project."
"He turned into a black hole, so dense that light cannot escape his field of gravity."
"Unfortunately, only his ideas can escape the gravity because they lack substance."
"What if you program in 'B'?"