Search Results for "eat right"

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 28, 2008's comic on:


Tags #company lawyer, #simple agreement, #impenetrable gibberish, #sour taste, #choke my suspenders, #exercise, #eat right, #finish, #health

View Transcript

Transcript

Company Lawyer Dilbert says, "Can you turn a simple agreement into impenetrable gibberish?" The lawyer says, "Absolutely. I can also leave a sour taste in everyone's mouth and make you want to choke me with my suspenders." The lawyer says, "If you exercise and eat right, you might still be alive when I finish it." Dilbert says, "Good enough."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 26, 2007's comic on:


Tags #meeting right now, #lunch time, #12 hours, #misery, #envy, #dead don't eat lucnch

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Can you come to a meeting right now? Dilbert: No, it's almost lunch time. If I miss lunch, my day will be 12 hours of uninterrupted misery. I will envy the dead. The Boss: That's stupid. The dead don't eat lunch either.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 15, 2011's comic on:


Tags #business ethics, #program website, #collect browser hostory, #invent device, #sense of right and wrong

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss: How hard would it be to program our website to collect browser history from our visitors? Dilbert: well, first Id need to invent some sort of device that reverses my sense of right and wrong. The Boss: so...we we talking about a week ...or a month?

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 12, 2011's comic on:


Tags #business ethics, #stock market, #hedge fund, #million dollars, #insider trading, #algorithm, #winning trades, #create algorithm, #eat fiber, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: I'll pay you a million dollars a year to work at my hedge fund. I'll do the insider trading and you pretend you created an algorithm that makes winning trades. Dilbert: What if I actually create the algorithm? Dogbert: Sure, and maybe you can eat fiber and make gold, too.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 17, 2011's comic on:


Tags #mathematics, #questioning, #second option, #feels right, #ignore data, #intuition, #slippery slope, #witch craft

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The second option feels right. Let's go with that. Dilbert: Should we always ignore what the data says, or is this more of a one-time thing? Boss: It's call intuition. Dilbert: It's a slippery slope to witchcraft.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 03, 2011's comic on:


Tags #depression (mental state), #despair, #ugly partment, #two ugly roomates, #ugly bus, #ugly building, #ugly cubicle, #eat lunch

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: I live in an ugly apartment with two ugly roommates. Each workday I take an ugly bus to an ugly building and spend the entire day in my ugly cubicle. Dilbert: At least you get to eat lunch with us. Asok: I've said too much.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 16, 2012's comic on:


Tags #meetings, #attend presentation, #authorized, #poor notes, #wasting time, #right meeting

View Transcript

Transcript

Coworker: My boss asked me to attend your presentation on his behalf. I should warn you that I'm not authorized to make decisions, and I take poor notes. Dilbert: Okay. Let's begin wasting our time! Coworker: I"m not even sure I'm in the right meeting.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 21, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #dinosaur, #joke, #carnivore, #robert, #cramp, #tail

View Transcript

Transcript

Dawn the Dinosaur points to Dilbert and says to Bob the Dinosaur, "You heard me, Robert. Eat him right this minute!" Bob says, "But . . . but." Dawn crosses her arms and says, "You call yourself a carnivore? Well, at least smite him with your mighty tail!" Bob looks sheepish. Dawn says to Dilbert, "And THIS will teach you not to mess with dinosaurs!" Bob rubs his tail and says, "Cramp . . ."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 03, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #tennis, #cans, #cannibals

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert stand on a tennis court holding rackets. Dilbert asks, "Did you bring a can of balls as I asked you to?" Dogbert replies, "Uh . . . Did you say CAN OF BALLS? I'll be right back." Dogbert says to a cannibal in a grass skirt, "Sorry, turns out we don't need you after all." The cannibal asks, "How about if I just eat the loser?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 26, 1989's comic on:


Tags #dieting & weight control, #Dilbert, #grocery store, #grape, #weight, #happy

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert pushes a shopping cart through a grocery store. A clerk says, "Hold it right there, fella!" Dilbert turns around and says, "Uh-oh . . . You must have seen me eat that grape in aisle 'B.'" The clerk responds, "I just want to make sure you pay for it." Dilbert lies on the scale at the cash register. The clerk says, "Looks like 192 pounds. What were you before you came in?" Dilbert replies, "Happy."