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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 25, 2010's comic on:


Tags #powerpoint coma, #trance, #eyes wide, #funny poses, #finger up nose, #police, #brain, #dead

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Dilbert thinks, "Uh-oh. My audience has fallen into a Powerpoint coma." Dilbert thinks, "The only thing I can do now is put them in funny poses and leave." Police Officer says, "It looks like his finger hit brain."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 26, 2012's comic on:


Tags #apple, #consumer prodcuts, #lust after products, #magic, #magic dust, #nose, #smell

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Dogbert: This is the magic dust that Apple puts on all of its consumer products to make you lust after them. I wouldn't sniff it if I were you. Terrific. Now I feel compelled to get a nose like yours for no rational reason.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 14, 1989's comic on:


Tags #nose, #office workers, #presentation, #itch

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Dilbert stands at the front of a room giving a presentation. He points to a diagram and says, ". . . And as you can see . . ." Dilbert wiggles his nose and thinks, "Uh oh . . . I got an itch in my nose." Dilbert thinks, ". . . Can't scratch it now without looking unprofessional." Dilbert thinks, "Maybe I can casually scratch it with one smooth gesture toward the easel." Back at home, Dilbert sits in his chair with a bandage on his nose. Dilbert says, "There's a good chance they thought it was part of the presentation." Dogbert asks, "Did the paramedics remove the pointer or just tape over it?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 06, 1999's comic on:


Tags #god hates pople, #coffee tastes better, #stir with finger, #lonely religion

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Wally and Dilbert are in the office kitchen getting coffee. Wally says, "I believe God created the earth because he hates people." Wally says, "And I believe coffee tastes better if you stir it with your finger." Dilbert says, "It sound like a lonely religion." Wally says, "They all start that way."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 21, 2000's comic on:


Tags #from the future, #time machine invention, #stick finger, #hole

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An older Dilbert with an oddly shaped head materializes in Dilberts cubicle. The future Dilbert says to Dilbert: "I am you from the future. Your time machine invention works." Dilbert asks: "How does my head get like that?" The future Dilbert points to a hole in a box that he wears at his chest and says: "Stick a finger in this hole."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 14, 2001's comic on:


Tags #layoff planning, #fire people, #creeps, #excessive nose haor, #called doctor, #five minute meeting

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Caption reads: "Layoff Planning." Catbert sits with the Boss at a table. The Boss says, "Let's fire all the people who give us the creeps..." "...All the people with excessive nose hair and anyone who insists on being called 'doctor.'" Carol enters into the cubicle of a man with long nose hair and bug eyes. She says, "You've got a five-minute meeting on Friday, Dr. Wolfington."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 26, 2000's comic on:


Tags #points at screen, #oily finger, #clean screen, #hover finger, #losing aura of infalliability

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The Boss points to the screen and tells Tina the Tech Writer while she is behind her computer: "Tina, move that title..." He continues: "...over here." Tina screams: "Aaaagh!!" She exclaims: "Your finger oil is on my screen!!!" She says: "Now I have to spend ten minutes cleaning it..." She continues: "...because you don't understand how to hover your finger." She demonstrates for the Boss: "See?! This isn't hard. You hover the finger! Don't touch!" The Boss thinks as he is walking away: "I hope I'm not losing my aura of infallibility."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 06, 2002's comic on:


Tags #premature clickage, #3 stooges, #visualize, #finger exercises, #contort face

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Headline: Mouse Training. The instructor says, "Today you will learn how to avoid premature clickage." The instructor continues, "Contort your face and visualize what you look like with a contorted face." The instructor sticks out two fingers and shakes his arm. He says, "Now pair off and we'll do some finger exercises that I call 'The Three Stooges.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 28, 2002's comic on:


Tags #war on waste, #wear shirt, #honk, #blow nose, #program

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The Boss picks up a T-Shirt that says "Wow" and exclaims, "Each of you will get a shirt as part of my war on waste program!" Dilbert responds, "I wouldn't wear that shirt at home or in the office, so what good is..." Wally blows his nose loudly into a shirt, "Honk!" Dilbert says, "Oh. Nevermind."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 05, 2002's comic on:


Tags #motor noises, #with lips, #scorpion king, #action figure, #personal message with nose, #trifecta, #carol

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Carol is sitting in her cubicle with a regular telephone in one hand and a cell phone in the other. She says into the regular phone, "So I told him to stop making noises with his lips." Carol turns and yells into the cell phone, "Get the Scorpion King action figure away from your sister's barbie!!!" Wally and Dilbert are looking over a cubicle wall. Wally says, "Now she's also typing a personal message with her nose!" Dilbert replies, "It's a trifecta!"