Boss: I have a report that you killed Ted in a cafeteria brawl. Dilbert: Not exactly. My brain stimulator had a software glitch, and it made me homicidal for a minute. Boss: So... you're a murderer, right? Dilbert: Software killed Ted. I was only the weapon.
Oh No. It's a technical glitch that I don't know how to fix. "GAA! NOw I must humble myself to some condescending engineer and ask for help!" "And how did I teach you to ask?" "I'm sorry that I spent my college years drinking beer and studying English literature."
Police Officer: Halt! You are under arrest for killing Ted in a cafeteria fight. Dilbert: I am innocent. My brain stimulator had a software glitch that made me do it. Police Officer: But you had free will, right? Dilbert: Do I have to believe in magic just to get arrested?