Search Results for "handle stress"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 24, 2011's comic on:


Tags #anxiety, #stress, #burned out, #gray hair, #don't handle stress

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Man: I'm burned out by this job. Is that a gray hair? Dilbert: Have we met? Man: I started yesterday. I don't handle stress well.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 15, 2000's comic on:


Tags #hired psychologust, #handle stress, #another engineer, #freaking quack, #outburst from alice

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At a meeting, the Boss tells the employees: "I hired a psychologist to help you handle stress." Alice says angrily: "We need another engineer not a freakin' quack!!" The Boss turns to the psychologist and asks him: "Is there a pill for that?" The psychologist replies: "I took it."

Wally's Stress Problem

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Wally's Stress Problem - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 21, 2015's comic on:


Tags #stress, #health, #work, #employee, #work ethic, #laziness, #excuse

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Wally: I need to take an extended medical leave to deal with my job-related stress. The stress is degrading my cardiovascular system. I could drop dead any minute. Boss: Which part of your job is causing stress? Wally: I think it's the work part.

Stress As A Wellness Issue

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Stress As A Wellness Issue - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 22, 2015's comic on:


Tags #loophole, #medicine, #health, #stress, #work, #medical leave, #work ethic, #laziness

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Boss: We have a problem. Our employee wellness site lists stress as a medical problem. And working here causes stress. Catbert: How many of them took paid medical leave? Boss: It's just you now. I'm packed.

Stress Typo On Website

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Stress Typo On Website - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 23, 2015's comic on:


Tags #health, #wellness, #corporate policy, #stress, #medical leave, #laziness, #loophole, #typo, #mistake, #work ethic

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CEO: How many employees did you say took paid medical leave? Catbert: All of them. A typo on our wellness website listed stress as an illness instead of a cause of illness. CEO: Is it too late to backpedal on the wellness thing? Catbert: I'll just fix the typo. It's all good.

Stress Balls

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Stress Balls - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 18, 2018's comic on:


Tags #stress, #frustration, #stress ball

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Catbert: I bought stress balls for everyone in the office. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! This ball is too hard to squeeze! It's stressing me out! How is this going to decrease my stress? Catbert: You're thinking of anti-stress balls.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 01, 2012's comic on:


Tags #big business, #business ethics, #executive program, #relocate, #vindictive, #stress, #loser, #turn down opportunity, #train, #discomfort, #underlings

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Boss: You've been selected for our executive development program. That means we can make you relocate to any godforsaken dirt stain we want. As soon as you make friends or find romance, we'll move you to someplace new and worse. It won't be the sort of work you'll enjoy, and the stress might kill you. If you turn down this opportunity, the company will forever label you as a loser. If you accept the offer, the company will train you to find pleasure in the discomfort of your underlings. I'm doing it right now! Dilbert: I HATE MY LIFE!!! Boss: Yes, yes, say more.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 25, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #acupuncture, #relieve stress, #needles, #sarcasm

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Dilbert and Dogbert sit outdoors. Dilbert says, "I've been considering acupuncture as a way to relieve stress." Dogbert asks, "The theory here is that sticking large needles into your body will help you relax?" Dilbert replies, "It sounds silly when YOU say it." Dogbert says, "Sometimes sarcasm helps us think more clearly."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 14, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #elbonians, #simple, #handle, #democracy, #elbonia, #national, #bird, #condor, #frisbee

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Dogbert sits on a throne wearing a miter. Dilbert says, "I know that the Elbonians are simple people, but they CAN handle democracy if you let them." Dogbert asks, "Do you know what the national bird of Elbonia is?" Dilbert guesses, "Condor?" Dogbert replies, "Frisbee."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 30, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #consultant, #advised, #handle, #sneaking, #stamping, #cancelled, #understand, #goodyear, #blimp

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The Boss says to Dilbert, Wally and Alice, "My consultant advised me to handle the layoffs in a direct, professional way." The Boss holds up a rubber stamp and continues, "So, throughout the day I'll be sneaking up on people and stamping 'Canceled' on their backs." As Wally runs away, Alice says, "Let me see if I understand . . ." The Boss points and says, "Hey! Is that the Goodyear blimp?"