Search Results for "hp printer ink"

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 25, 2004's comic on:


Tags #accounting, #expense figures, #base ten, #counting system, #full range, #odds and even, #hp printer ink, #finance troll

View Transcript

Transcript

"Accounting" "Can you explain these expense figures?" "It's a base ten accounting system with a full range of odd and even digits." "This isn't helping." "Tastes like hp printer ink... high gloss paper, four hours old."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 04, 2005's comic on:


Tags #receptionist, #director, #first impressions, #salesman, #ceo of hp, #printer cartrideges

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: "I might appear to be a receptionist, but I'm actually a director of first impressions." CEO: "I might appear to be a salesman of printer cartridges, but I'm really the CEO of HP." Carol: "Carly?" CEO "You look like a 57."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 19, 2011's comic on:


Tags #embarrassment, #printmaking, #printer prowler, #spots activity, #minions

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The printer prowler spots activity. It's time to see what the minions are working on. They're on to me.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 20, 2011's comic on:


Tags #commerce, #credit, #forbidden knowledge, #change to dotted lines, #made of ink

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Change all of the lines to dotted. We're not made of ink. Dilbert: Why'd I just get chills? Boss: Me too. It feels like some sort of forbidden knowledge.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 08, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #brochures, #quiz, #toaster, #disk, #drive, #printer, #emergency, #electronics anonymous

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dogbert says, "Please read these brochures, it could save your life." Dilbert looks at a brochure and asks, "'Electronics Anonymous?'" Dogbert says, "Let's take the enclosed quiz. Number one: How many options do you have on your toaster?" Dilbert asks, "Does that include the toaster disk drive and printer?" Dogbert says, "I think we can skip directly to the emergency application form."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 21, 1995's comic on:


Tags #lots howard, #cubicle neigborr, #immortal soul, #laser printer, #dogbert doesn't care

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says to Dilbert, "Allow me to introduce Loud Howard." Howard, a man with a huge mouth, shouts, "Hi!" Wally says, "I will make Loud Howard your cubicle neighbor in the new office unless you give me your immortal soul!!" Howard shouts, "Nice day!" Back at home, Dilbert and Dogbert lie on the couch. Dilbert says, ". . . Fortunately I convinced him to take my laser printer instead . . ." Trying to read a book, Dogbert says, "What did I say that sounded like 'Tell me about your day?'"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 13, 1996's comic on:


Tags #shared laser printer, #apollo space mission, #wally invented cursor

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally presses a button on his keyboard and thinks, "Gotta hurry. One . . . two . . . three . . ." Wally runs out of his cubicle and thinks, "I have twelve seconds to get to the shared laser printed." As Wally peers around the corner, Alice and Dilbert stand at the printer reading copies of Wally's resume. Alice says, "Guess who saved the Apollo 13 space mission." Dilbert says, "Did you know that Wally invented the cursor?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 17, 1998's comic on:


Tags #ken the skeptic, #contents of envelope, #charcoal drawing, #woodchuck, #small orange, #little frauf, #ink drawing, #beaver eating tangerine

View Transcript

Transcript

Ken the Skeptic... Ken holds an envelope and says, "I alone know the contents of this envelope." Ratbert sits on a stool. Ratbert holds his hands to his temples and says, "It's a charcoal drawing of a woodchuck eating a small orange." Keen says, "Nice try, you little fraud, but that's a long way from an ink drawing of a beaver eating a tangerine."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 24, 1994's comic on:


Tags #voice controlled computer, #envious, #mouse driven, #color printer denied, #delete a file, #curses

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: "?" Dilbert: "Expand...window." Wally: "Well, look who got a voice-controlled computer." Dilbert: "Insert...column." wally: "If I were a lesser engineer I might be envious." dilbert: "Add...row." Wally: "I don't mind using my prehistoric mouse-driven computer." "And I'm not bitter about my request for a color printer being denied." "At least I won't work all day then accidently..." "DELETE...A FILE!!" Dilbert: "#!@%%&" Wally: "Please...not in front of the computer."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 11, 1994's comic on:


Tags #copier paper, #laser printer, #made mockery, #phil, #prince of inssufficient light, #punishment, #tracked speatrely, #borrowing paper

View Transcript

Transcript

"Copy Room" "Stop right there!" "It's Phil, the Prince of Insufficient Light." "What's in your hands?" "I'm just borrowing some paper for the laser printer. There's no law against that!" "I think we both know that the copier paper and the printer paper are purchased and tracked separately." "You've made a mockery of the system! I darn you to heck!" "Your punishment is to sit at the secretary's cubicle and endure the stale wit of your co-workers." "Hey, Wendy, there's something different about you today!"