Search Results for "immersive technology"

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

Blist Point For 3 D Goggles

Thank you for voting.
Blist Point For 3 D Goggles - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 27, 2014's comic on:


Tags #technology, #virtual reality, #immersive technology, #customer retention, #moratlity, #death

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: We found the "bliss point" for immersive 3-D headgear. The product is so good that 87% of our customers starved to death while using it. CEO: We never get the customer retention part right.

3 D Immersive Goggles

Thank you for voting.
3 D Immersive Goggles - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 26, 2014's comic on:


Tags #technology, #distraction, #death, #mortality, #virtual reality

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Hey, Ted, how do you like our new 3-D immersive goggles you've been testing for two weeks? Some people say the experience is so good that you forget to eat. You're dead, aren't you...

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 04, 2010's comic on:


Tags #meeting, #technology service, #hospice, #bazooka, #hold gun, #intimidate, #compassion, #surprise, #scared, #computer, #windows xp

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "I hired the Dogbert Technology Hospice Service to ease the suffering of our dying technology." The Boss says, "Dogbert will use compassion and? what was the other thing?" Dogbert says, "Bazooka." Dogbert says, "Step away from the Windows XP!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 19, 2010's comic on:


Tags #website, #revamp, #launch, #technology, #crash, #success, #failure

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "We launched our revamped website today." Dilbert says, "All of the technology we used is already obsolete and every vendor we hired is out of business." Dilbert says, "?And it just crashed." Dilbert says, "I miss the days when we had brief windows of success."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 04, 2009's comic on:


Tags #facts, #thimble, #knowledge, #suggestion, #technology, #strategy

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "Here's the mountain of facts that support my recommended technology strategy." Dilbert says, "And here's a tiny thimble that holds everything you know about technology. Maybe you could?" Dilbert says, "Leaders don't like it when you suggest they wear the thimble of knowledge like a little hat."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 08, 2009's comic on:


Tags #technology, #changing, #competition, #submitting, #management, #delays

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "After eight months, senior management finally approved your project plan." Dilbert says, "It's too late. All of the technology has changed and our competitors have leapfrogged us." The Boss says, "Maybe you could write a new plan." Dilbert says, "Or we could get the same result by resubmitting this one."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 18, 2010's comic on:


Tags #presentation, #marketing video, #comments, #finished, #annoyed, #technology, #false, #wrong, #angry, #arms out, #Funny, #glare

View Transcript

Transcript

Woman says, "And that's our new marketing video. We hope it will go viral." The Boss says, "You'll have our comments by tomorrow." Woman says, "I'm not asking for comments. The video is already finished." Dilbert says, "The technology claims in the video are criminally inaccurate." Woman says, "I sent the script to engineering for comments three months ago!" Woman says, "I got an email back from someone named Wally who said it was great." Wally says, "I thought she was asking if it was funny."

Marketing Is Only Legal Because It Doesn't Work

Thank you for voting.
Marketing Is Only Legal Because It Doesn't Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 07, 2015's comic on:


Tags #technology, #marketing, #robot, #robotics, #slave, #robots, #etiquette & ethics

View Transcript

Transcript

Coworker: Sales are up 900% since we programmed our robots to emotionally manipulate their owners into buying upgrades. Dilbert: Um, you do know marketing is only legal because it doesn't work most of the time, right? Coworker; Nope. I do not know that. Shiny! Dilbert: We invented a technology to enslave homo sapiens?

Dilbert Fixes Boss's Technology Strategy

Thank you for voting.
Dilbert Fixes Boss's Technology Strategy - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 09, 2015's comic on:


Tags #verbiage, #technical, #jargon, #deception, #logic, #team player, #babble

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: fixed your technology strategy. I couldn't make it sound logical, so I buried the stupid parts under seven layers of technical babble. Add an irrelevant graph and no one will be the wiser... literally. Boss: Please stop being a team player.

Brain Scan And 3 D Scanner

Thank you for voting.
Brain Scan And 3 D Scanner - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 21, 2015's comic on:


Tags #replication, #technology, #clone, #playing god, #doppelganger

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My invention can scan the human brain and duplicate it in software. I combined that technology with a 3-D printer that makes human body parts. Boss: What does it all do? Replicant: He's getting to the good part.