Search Results for "information booth"
Share January 03, 2005's comic on:
The Boss: Carol, I'm making you our new director of first impressions pro team! Carol: My years of hard work have finally paid off! Im a dierctor! Carol: Why is my office in the lobby? Can you direct me ti the nearest growler?
Share April 06, 2011's comic on:
Alice says, "His brain shut down from information overload, so I asked a libertarian taxidermist to stuff him." Alice says, "There's a hand hole in the back so we can work him like a puppet." Dilbert says, "It's sort of creepy." Alice says, "You'll get used to it."
Share August 11, 2011's comic on:
Dogbert: The great thing about being a sociopath is that everything feels like a victimless crime. If you give me some insider information for my hedge fund, I'll split the profit with you. Think of it as a tax on people you don't know. CEO: That's the best kind!
Share January 04, 2012's comic on:
Dilbert: Based on this new information, you'll want to change our project scope. Boss: I don't do that. Dilbert: What? Think? Today I learned it's better if I don't try to guess what people mean.
Share April 23, 2012's comic on:
Coworker: Please tell me our apps don't steal contact information from our users' address books. Boss: We upload the data but we don't store it. Coworker: That's like saying I can date your wife if I put a bag over her head. Boss: That could work. Coworker: I don't think I'm getting through to you.
Share May 06, 2012's comic on:
Tags #booth, #brochure, #exhibitions, #exhibitor expenses, #expenses, #huge crowds, #last 11 years, #logo sign, #new customers, #popular booth, #spillover, #steal chair, #trade show, #video of incident, #youtube
Boss: How did we do at the trade show? Dilbert: We had a huge crowd around our booth the entire time. But it was just the spillover from the popular booth next to us. The only person who asked for our brochure used it to kill a spider. Some guy tried to steal our extra chair and then Alice beat him senseless with our logo sign. A video of the incident is already on YouTube. It cost us $200,000 to be an exhibitor and we gained zero new customers. So it was just like the last eleven years. Boss: I feel good about next year!
Share July 01, 2012's comic on:
Mordac: I am Mordac, the preventer of information services. Dilbert: I know. We've worked together for years. Mordac: And it still sounds awesome when I say it. Anyway, I up-graded our network security to include facial recognition. Your temporary password is this face. You'll need extensive plastic surgery to log on the first time. Dilbert: You've gone too far, Mordac! I will escalate this! Boss: I wish we'd had this conversation a week ago.
Share December 23, 1989's comic on:
Dilbert drives his car and thinks, "Uh-oh . . . Toll booth ahead. Turn down the radio . . . Get exact change ready . . ." Dilbert stops at the tooth booth and says to the toll collector, "Good morning!" Dilbert drives away thinking, "I wonder if it's normal to want the toll-taker to like me."
Share July 11, 1995's comic on:
Dogbert, Alice, Wally and a man sit at a conference table. Dogbert is wearing a bishop's miter and holding a scepter. Dogbert announces, "I am Saint Dogbert. I have come to drive out the stale and overused jokes about the information superhighway." The man comments, "Sometimes I feel like roadkill on the information superhighway!" Dogbert knocks the man out with a blow to the head. Dogbert faces the reader and says, "Don't make me come over there!"
Share February 05, 1996's comic on:
Dogbert, Wally, Dilbert, Alice and the Boss sit at a conference table. Dogbert says, "I have discovered the cause of your project delays." Dogbert continues, "Somebody in this room is a piece of deadwood pretending to be a contributor!" Dogbert points his tail at a piece of wood in a dress and shouts, "It is you!" The deadwood says, "Hey, I made some calls and I'm waiting for information!"