Search Results for "insults woman"

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 09, 1994's comic on:


Tags #ask dilbert, #attractive, #bad hair, #engineers can't lie, #hairdo, #insults woman, #make ship date, #technical questions, #truth, #bugs are features

View Transcript

Transcript

"I brought Dilbert, in case you have any technical questions about our product." "Heh-heh...engineers don't know how to lie. The truth will be mine." "Uh-oh." "Ted said your product is bug-free. Is that true Dilbert?" "Well, yes, that's true." "I mean, basically true. Technicaly true. Sort of." "No-o-o!! It's a lie! All the bugs were reclassified as security features just to make the ship date!!" "And we both think you could be attractive if you'd just do SOMETHING with your hair." "Why did I bring you along?" "The evidence suggests that you're stupid."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 03, 1994's comic on:


Tags #imagine, #being a woman, #men in training, #people acknowledge, #can't find keys, #blouse falls off, #distorted view, #misogyny

View Transcript

Transcript

"In this sensitivity excercise, close your eyes and imagine how it feels to be a woman." "People acknowledge my existence. They smile for no reason and hold hte door open. I'm ...I'm popular." "I can't find my keys." "I'm never going back. I can't. I won't." "My blouse falls to the floor..." "Break! Break!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 24, 1994's comic on:


Tags #nineties woman, #man pay dinner, #slap a man, #threatening

View Transcript

Transcript

LIZ: I'm a nineties kind of woman. I demand equality but the man must pay for dinner. "And recent surveys show that many women my age think it's okay to slap a man." DILBERT: "Really? Did they name the man?" LIZ: "Don't make me come over there."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 02, 1995's comic on:


Tags #company dress code, #dress like a woman, #high heels, #panty hose, #little ornaments, #male viwers

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice is dressed in a shirt, tie and pants. Alice says to Dilbert and Wally, "I'm protesting the company's dress code. I refuse to dress like a woman." Alice clenches her fist and continues forcefully, "High heels and pantyhose are designed to make women look like helpless little ornaments for the pleasure of male viewers!" Wally says, "I've never had pleasure viewing you. I swear." Alice says, "Thank you for your support."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 03, 1995's comic on:


Tags #actually a woman, #claim, #crying game, #dress code, #dress like a man, #the boss

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice stands in front of the Boss's desk dressed in a shirt, tie and pants. She says to the Boss, "I'm dressing like a man to protest the company's dress code." The Boss asks, "So, what you're saying is that you're actually a woman. Is that your claim?" Alice says, "That's not exactly the point." The Boss says, "I saw 'The Crying Game.' Don't do anything that would make me heave."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 17, 1995's comic on:


Tags #co worker, #perfume is killing, #gas mask, #humor, #woman, #stank like hog, #cluless, #waiting compliments

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert hands Dogbert a gas mask and says, "Dogbert, your mission is to tell my co-worker that her perfume is killing us. Wear this gas mask." As Dilbert puts the mask on Dogbert, he says, "Use humor to ease the tension." Dogbert says, "Good idea." Wearing the mask, Dogbert stands in the woman's cubicle and says, "Did you hear the joke about the woman who stank like a hog rendering plant?" The woman says, "Three times today . . ."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 18, 1995's comic on:


Tags #smell bad, #perfume, #killing people, #cpr, #let me die, #Dogbert, #woman, #bad perfume

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands on a woman's desk wearing a gas mask. He says, "I have failed in my attempt to subtly tell you that your perfume is killing people. I will try a direct approach." Dogbert removes the mask and screams, "Hey!! You smell bad!!! B-a-a-a-d!!" Dilbert collapses onto the desk and the woman asks, "Should I give you CPR?" Dogbert says, "No-o-o-o!! Let me die!!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 02, 1996's comic on:


Tags #antina, #non stereotypical woman, #computer monitor, #coffe machine, #butch woman, #shirt and tie

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his computer and Antina appears in the door of his cubicle. Antina is muscular, has short hair and is wearing a tie and a skirt. She says, "Hi, I'm Antina the Non-stereotypical Woman." Antina observes, "That computer monitor you're using is supposed to be 17 inches, but it's more like 16.5 inches." She continues, "I took the coffee machine apart just for fun - want to see?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 28, 1997's comic on:


Tags #cloud of doom, #dangerous and sexy, #lighting strikes, #woman, #flirting with dilbert

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands in a crowd of people at a party. The cloud of doom floats above his head. A woman says, "I notice you have a cloud of doom. I must admit it makes you seem dangerous and sexy." A bolt of lightning from the cloud strikes the woman. Dilbert says, "Sorry. That happens to everyone who gets near me." The woman replies, "No problem. I'm one of those women who never learn." Smoke rises from the woman and her clothes are charred.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 25, 1997's comic on:


Tags #seeing beautiful woman, #curtains, #venetian blinds, #lawn chair in yard

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says to Dilbert, "I've been seeing a beautiful woman. But something came between us." Dilbert says, "Her curtains?" Wally says, "Venetian blinds. Totally unforgiving." Dilbert says, "Maybe she got spooked when you put the lawn chair in her yard."