Search Results for "sink attaches to body"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 24, 2010's comic on:


Tags #invention, #gadget, #sink attaches to body, #faucet on head, #running water, #work, #annoyed, #hearing, #yell

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Wally says, "I invented a sink that attaches to my body. The faucet is activated by your voice." The Boss says, "Wally, what possible use could this stupid thing have? I need you to do some real work." Wally says, "What? I can't hear you when the water is running!"

Asok's Body Double

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Asok's Body Double - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 17, 2016's comic on:


Tags #arrest, #hit man, #mistaken identity, #body double, #doppelganger

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Alice: I thought you got arrested for killing the creator of Garfield's body double. Asok: Almost. They arrested my body double. Alice: Why do you have a body double? Asok: It's for situations like this.

Dilbert Is Wearing A Body Cam

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Dilbert Is Wearing A Body Cam - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 07, 2017's comic on:


Tags #lying, #body cam, #surveillance

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Boss: Don't give that data to Marketing yet. Dilbert: That is the direct opposite of what you told me yesterday. Boss: I am totally sure I never said anything like that yesterday. You weren't wearing a wire, were you? Dilbert: It's called an employee body cam. Narrator: Continued...

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 16, 2010's comic on:


Tags #robot body, #human brain, #best talent, #display case

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The Boss says, "I found a way to keep our best talent from leaving." Dilbert says, "Wow! You found a way to interface a human brain with a robot body to get the best of both!" The Boss says, "Actually, it's just a cool display case, but your thing would be good too."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 28, 2010's comic on:


Tags #statue of liberty, #destroy, #pr, #responsibility, #clean up, #new york harbor, #light show, #weapon demo, #consultant, #cuba, #air force, #sink, #yell, #angry, #private jet, #head

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Dogbert the public relations consultant Dogbert says, "So you accidentally destroyed the Statue of Liberty?" Dogbert says, "Her head is floating toward Cuba, and the president will probably order the air force to sink it." CEO says, "I should watch that from my private jet." Dogbert says, "FOCUS!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 14, 2014's comic on:


Tags #body language, #fear, #rationality, #threatening, #criticism

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Boss: Alice, people are uncomfortable with your communication style. Alice: Did someone complain? Boss: No, I'm picking it up in their body language. Alice: So.. people have bad posture and that means I don't say things right? Boss: Call it a gut feeling. Alice: Ohhhh. That sounds rational. Let's toss some feng shui into the equation and maybe get a psychic to contact the dead to see what they say bout me. Or maybe everyone could stop being whiny babies! Oh, wait. I see it now.

Body Doubles Are People Too

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Body Doubles Are People Too - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 16, 2016's comic on:


Tags #hit man, #murder, #mistaken identity, #doppelganger

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Cop: Asok, you are under arrest for murdering the creator of Garfield's body double. Asok: That's not fair! It wasn't even a real person! It was a body double! Cop: Actually, body doubles are human beings, too. Asok: You're going to arrest me on a technicality?

Accidental Deletion

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Accidental Deletion - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 08, 2017's comic on:


Tags #surveillance, #coverup, #body cam, #denial, #deception, #proof

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Dilbert: I'm glad I started wearing an employee body cam. Here's a video of you yesterday, saying the opposite of what you told me today. Boss: Oops! I accidentally deleted it. Dilbert: Luckily, I have seven hundred backups.

Contradicting Himself

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Contradicting Himself - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 09, 2017's comic on:


Tags #surveillance, #managing, #proof, #body cam, #camera, #recording

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Dilbert: According to my employee body cam playback, you contradicted yourself eleven times today. Boss: Your stupid body cam is interfering with my ability to manage. Dilbert: By "manage," do you mean contradicting yourself and later denying it? Boss: I don't not mean that.

Repeating Your Point Too Much

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Repeating Your Point Too Much - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 10, 2017's comic on:


Tags #body cam, #camera, #survillance, #insult, #rudeness

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Dilbert: According to my body cam playback, you have repeated your point twelve times. Maybe you could try saying other things for a few minutes. Man: I wasn't expecting you to be so rude. Dilbert: You're not the first to make that mistake.