Search Results for "whining misfit"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 05, 2000's comic on:


Tags #new personlaity, #non standard, #approved corporate personalities, #sycophants glad hander, #sadist, #prima donna, #empty suit, #whining misfit, #spec sheet, #dialoque

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Caption reads: "Catbert, evil H.R. Director." Catbert is sitting behind a desk in a throne-like chair. He tells Dilbert, who is sitting in a very small chair: "We've decided to give you a new personality." Dilbert is surprised: "What! Why?" Catbert explains: "You're current personality is non-standard." He continues: "You must choose one of the approved corporate personalities." Catbert presents the options: "The choices are sycophant, glad-hander, sadist, quantoid, prima donna, empty suit, or whining misfit." Dilbert says: "Empty suit sounds interesting." Catbert says: "Excellent choice. Here's the Spec Sheet." Wally asks Dilbert about the meeting: "How did it go?" Dilbert answers, reading from the Spec Sheet: "Same ol' Same ol'. You got that right!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 27, 2011's comic on:


Tags #direction, #managers, #increase clairty, #whining

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CEO: employees keep whining that we don't have a clear direction. So Ive doubled the number of managers one each group to increase the clarity. The Boss: I thought we were doubling the direction. No, we're doubling the clarity.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 16, 1995's comic on:


Tags #late, #makeup on, #in car, #save in car, #sponge bath, #carpool, #whining, #driver for car pool

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Alice walks in carrying a briefcase and sees Wally and Dilbert drinking coffee. Alice says, "I was so late I had to put on my makeup in the car." Dilbert says, "Yeah, I had to shave in the car." Wally says, "That's nothing. I was so late that I had to give myself a sponge bath in the car." Alice looks shocked and asks, "Aren't you the driver for your carpool?" Wally responds, "You've never heard such whining."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 20, 1995's comic on:


Tags #dogbert the consultant, #reorganize, #core comeptency, #giving money, #consultants

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The Boss sits across from Dogbert's desk. Dogbert says, "I recommend that you reorganize to strengthen the core competency of your company." Dogbert continues, "As luck would have it, your core competency is 'giving money to consultants.'" The Boss says, "I don't think that's the ONLY thing we're good at." Dogbert responds, "It depends on if you count 'whining.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 04, 2006's comic on:


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"You're always complaining about the management of your company so I decided to do something about it." "I used my billions to buy your company!" "You're going to fix management?" "No, I just wanted to stop all the whining. You're fired."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 14, 2009's comic on:


Tags #office, #Environment, #confronting, #perception, #hot, #complaining

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Dilbert says, "We replaced our styrofoam cups with paper cups, but it's not so clear that it helps the planet." The boss says, "We didn?t do it to help the planet. We did it to look like the sort of company that cares about that sort of thing." DIlbert says, "Oh. In that case it's working great." The boss says, "As soon as you stop whining."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 30, 2013's comic on:


Tags #complaining, #depression (mental state), #inventions, #self worth, #doubt, #microwave, #machine language, #kill me, #beep

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Robot: You keep giving me trivial assignments that make me doubt my self-worth. Boss: Chill out. You don't hear the microwave whining all day long. Robot: He doesn't know that the machine word for "Please kill me is 'Beep.'" Microwave: Beep.