STRIP FOR Mar 26, 2009

I propose that Obama replaces Geitner with Dogbert... Yahoo Dogbert! Gotta love him!

- news in brief - Revalued AmeriProducts and Evaluations (formerly ComRob AmeriProducts) has embraced the immediacy of the internet and released an immediate press release explaing their product on YouTube. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-UNRgy48mo) Jim Cramer, a financial correspondent and host on CNBC visibly wept while watching the clip, muttering through hot streaming rivers of tears, "Yes! Yes! Yes! Deliverance is near ...the nightmare ... the nightmare ... almost gone ... John Stewart ... gonna' eat ...." The camera cut away as he began visibly wetting his slacks again. A line producer was heard off mic before the cutaway , " ...get that fruitcake Depends, already, will ya? I'm not changing him, again, either!"
CEO Dogbert seemed pleased. "That Jim Cramer, guy, he may be unstable and have bladder issues, but he still has some use in this post economic recovery. His bald pate would be ideal for wiping the mud from my paws. Oh, and if you buy one of our financial instruments today, you get a free whistle and a toy balloon that says "RAPE is good". "

RAPE shares skyrocketed past the mythical five dollar mark so far this morning, currently hovering at USD 5.795.

Hmmm - is Dogbert going to fleece the company tomorrow then spend his bonus on Panamanian beach fronts on Saturday? There always seems to be a pattern when he like, you know, fleeces Dilbert's company.

Man! I had to peer carefully at final panel. I thought Dogbert was laying one on the table - perhaps it's merely an air biscuit.