Dilbert.com by Scott Adams

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags six months, project six months, one month, annual visit, doesn't understand, selfish boss, impossible tasks, time frames etc

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"If I start the project today and work nights and weekends it will take...oh, six months." "It has to be done in ONE month so we can show it to our VP on her annual visit." "I have to know; does it even cross your mind to handle this differently?" "I'll need daily status reports on why you're so behind."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags computer program, spelled wrong, colons, collen, ass

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The Boss: "I saw the code for your computer program yesterday." "It looked easy. It's just a bunch of typing. And half the words were spelled wrong." "And don't get me started about your over-use of colons." Dilbert: "They remind me of you, sir."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags video conference, desktop, telecommuting, level of professionalism, share document, next time

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"This desktop video conference thing is great!" "Even though you're telecommuting, you still maintain a level of professionalism." "Let's share a document next time."