Dilbert.com by Scott Adams

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags top priority, last month, dated

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The Boss: Take care of this immediately. It's your top priority. Dilbert: Top Priority?? This is dated last month, Its been on your desk for weeks and now its your top priority?? The Boss: I said its your top priority. I still don't care about it, Dilbert: well...okay the,

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags upgrade boss computer, cardboard prop, came with desk, new mother board, new desk, needs, no actual computer

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The Boss: "I want you to help me upgrade the computer in my office." Dilbert: "The computer in your office is a cardboard prop that came with your desk." The Boss: "So, I need a new motherboard, right?" Dilbert: "No, you need a new desk."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags no raises, appliances, television, fridge, lava lamp, jar of mayonnaise, dog, boss, dilberet, animals, entertainment

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"This year, instead of raises we're giving appliances." "What?!" "High performers could get a color television or a new 'fridge." "He called it a 'lava lamp'." "I call it a jar of old mayonnaise."