Dilbert.com by Scott Adams
Friday May 18,
2018
Stress Balls
Tags stress, frustration, stress ball
Transcript
Catbert: I bought stress balls for everyone in the office. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! This ball is too hard to squeeze! It's stressing me out! How is this going to decrease my stress? Catbert: You're thinking of anti-stress balls.
Thursday May 17,
2018
Conditions For Wally To Be On The Team
Tags laziness, work ethic, excuses
Transcript
Wally: My boss gave me approval to join your project team under the condition I don't take on any extra work. Woman: The whole point of being on the project is to do extra work. Maybe I should talk to your boss. Wally: His other condition is that you never contact him.
Wednesday May 16,
2018
Facial Recognition Software
Tags facial recognition, stupid, insult, obliviousness, prototype, intelligence
Transcript
Dilbert: I'm designing a device that uses facial recognition to detect stupidity. I need your help creating the pattern-recognition algorithm. Boss: What do you need me to do? Dilbert: Look straight ahead and smile.


