Dilbert.com by Scott Adams

Boss Instincts

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Boss Instincts - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags instinct, gut, mating, sex, choosing

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Boss: Both options look good, but I need to choose one. I'll have to rely on my instinct. Dilbert: What does your instinct tell you? Boss: It's mostly about mating. Dilbert: Run.

Deducing Rank

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Deducing Rank - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags hierarchy, rank, marketing, jargon, lingo, adspeak, business

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Dilbert: I don't know how to answer your question because I got here late and I haven't deduced your rank in the company. Woman: I'm the new director of Marketing, so you need to pretend my question makes sense. Dilbert: Give me a minute to get into that mindset. Woman: Take your time.

The Losing Team

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The Losing Team  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags blockchain, training, improvement, legacy, education, skills

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Dilbert: I'd like to work on our blockchain project to keep my skills updated. Boss: I need you to be a team player and maintain our legacy systems until your technical skills become obsolete. Dilbert: What kind of team is that? Boss: You'll be on the losing team.