Dilbert.com by Scott Adams
Monday December 04,
2017
Boss Finds A Thumb Drive
Tags computers, infection, malware, obliviousness, virus, hacker, hacking
Transcript
Boss: I found a thumb drive on the sidewalk. It must be my lucky day. It's like free money! Dilbert: Can free money infect our network, too? Boss: You worry too much. Dilbert: If you need me, I'll be selling all of my company stock.
Sunday December 03,
2017
Tags team, teamwork, team building, death, cover-up, denial, human resources, drowning, rafting, business, medical
Transcript
Boss: As you know, our team-building event did not go smoothly. In my defense, I had no way of knowing a class 6 whitewater adventure would be so bumpy. It took me by surprise when Ted fell in. But I'm proud that we came together as a team and agreed to not look for him. It would have ruined our timing for lunch. Anyway, I'm sure Ted swam to safety. Dilbert: Ted doesn't know how to swim. Boss: All in favor of pretending Ted didn't attend the event? Catbert: They didn't have life vests? Boss: You're thinking of the deluxe package.
Saturday December 02,
2017
Nailed It
Tags finances, guessing, estimate, catchphrase, clever
Transcript
Boss: I can't give you a raise because your financial forecasts were all wrong. Dilbert: Financial forecasts are always wrong. You told me to make one anyway. Boss: In other words, I nailed it and you failed it. Dilbert: Catchy.


