Dilbert.com by Scott Adams

Men Who Do The Driving

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Men Who Do The Driving - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dating, driving, men, conversation, relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Woman: I like a man who always offers to do the driving on dates? Dilbert: Like Uber? Woman: But less expensive, and no waiting. Dilbert; So you're saying I'm better than Uber? Woman: You would be if you didn't talk.

Alice Takes On More Work

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Alice Takes On More Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags work ethic, laziness, workload, philosophy, semantics

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Why do I keep taking on more work while you do noting? Wally: That's because you optimize for productivity, while I optimize for my happiness. Alice: That makes you a freeloader. Wally: I prefer the label "happy winner."

Sales Is Blaming Marketing

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Sales Is Blaming Marketing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags sales, responsibility, blame, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Our salespeople are blaming Marketing for the low demand. Marketing is blaming Engineering for making a product no one wants. So I blamed our customers for misleading us about their needs. Asok: Now I don't feel so bad about our price-gouging.