Dilbert.com by Scott Adams

Biggest Obstacle

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Biggest Obstacle - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags criticism, honesty, success

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Boss: What is your biggest obstacle to success on this project? Dilbert: It's you. It's always you. Should I add that to the business plan? Boss: Let's keep it general.

Wally's Cousin Ronnie Dies

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Wally's Cousin Ronnie Dies - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags human resources, hr, funeral, time off, bereavement, business

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Wally: I need to take some bereavement time, with pay, because my cousin Ronnie died. Catbert: Cousins don't count unless you married one. Wally: We were domestic partners. What's the police on that, you bigot?

Wally Asks About Bereavement Leave

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Wally Asks About Bereavement Leave - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags laziness, bereavement, deception, time off

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Wally: Does the company offer bereavement leave? Boss: Yes. Wally: Good, because I have hundreds of cousins that don't 'take care of themselves. Cousin Ronnie just fell off a shed.