Dilbert.com by Scott Adams

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags technology, coding, code, control, efficiency, purpose, job, red tape, business

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Mordac: Step away from that open source code! Dilbert: Why? Mordac: Because I am Mordac, The Preventer of All Efficient Solutions in the Information Technology Realm. Dilbert: That isn't an actual job. Mordac: I was hoping it was. I lost the file with my job description. That was five years ago. I've been winging it since then. My parents taught me that I could be anything I wanted to be. And I wanted to be this. So don't use that code! Dilbert: Not even when you turn around?

Boss Is Victim Of Identity Thief

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Boss Is Victim Of Identity Thief - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags identity theft, impostor, insult, investment, money, stealing, guest artist, josh shipley

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Boss: An identity thief stole my identity and opened a brokerage account. Dilbert: How did they know he was an impostor? Did he make a smart investment? Boss: That isn't funny. Wally: Did the impostor have a sense of humor?

Dogbert Talks Past The Sale

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Dogbert Talks Past The Sale - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags manipulation, negotiating, negotiation, psychology, guest artist, josh shipley

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Dogbert: Do you want to prepare and serve my favorite food to me now or in one minute? Dilbert: Why do you always that manipulative trick of making me think past the sale? Dogbert: Because it works? Dilbert: One minute! Not a second sooner!