Dilbert.com by Scott Adams

How Amazing The Weekend Was

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
How Amazing The Weekend Was - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags relationships, friendship, small talk, love, dating, frustration, obliviousness, conversation

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Do you want to hear how amazing my weekend was? Alice: No. Would you like to hear about the extended tragedy that is my social life? Boss: No. I went to the mountains. Alice: I fell in love with a dying polygamist.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags social, party, invite, relationships, friend, friendship, test, popularity

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I'm having some people over to my house after work. Would you like to come? Woman: Who else is coming? Dilbert: Seven people said maybe, and one said he would get back to me. I think that shows a lot of interest. So how about it? Can you come? Woman: It depends on whether my sister needs a ride to the airport. Dilbert: When will you know? Woman: I'll text you. Dogbert: Are you sad that no one came? Dilbert: No, I was just A-B testing to see if I still hate all of them.

Death By Emoji

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Death By Emoji - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags emoji, communication, miscommunication, murder, crime, deception, engineers, work ethic

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I tried to use emoji characters and accidentally ordered two of my engineers to kill Ted. They say they did it. CEO: Did the engineers complain about being too busy to do it? Boss: No. Oh, I see it now. CEO: Total hoax.