Dilbert.com by Scott Adams
Tuesday June 25,
2013
Tags managers & supervisors, time estimate, propsal, win bid, wet sponge, insulted me, business
Transcript
Boss: I adjusted your time estimate on the proposal from two years to one so we could win the bid. I plan to make up the time by squeezing you like a wet sponge that insulted me. Then the wet sponge insulted me.
Monday June 24,
2013
Tags cruelty, era, original signature, signatures, time machine, telegraph system
Transcript
Coworker: You'll need to mail me the original signature page after everyone signs it. Dilbert: No problem. I'll use my time machine to go back to an era in which mailing original signatures made some kind of sense. I wonder if there will ever be a way to send images over the telegraph system.
Sunday June 23,
2013
Tags anger, executives, happiness, deadline, no disturbance, threat, fired, do/dont, sexist, powertrip, euphoria, overpaid, psychology
Transcript
Boss: I'm on a deadline, so don't let anyone disturb me for at least an hour. If anyone gets past you, you're fired. CEO: Tell your boss to come to my office now. Carol: He'll fire me if I disturb him. CEO: I'm your CEO! Disturb your boss now or I'll fire you. Boss: I heard that, and if you disturb me, you're fired. CEO: You're fired if you don't! Boss: You're fired if you do! CEO: Whoa! Hold on! I'm getting a sudden wave of euphoria. Boss: Me too! CEO: Is it because we're overpaid? Boss: It... it feels... wonderful!


