Dilbert.com by Scott Adams

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags invention, scientist, music player, throw coffee cup, kung fu, knock out, steal idea, science

View Transcript

Transcript

Man says, "I invented a music device that reads your brain waves and only plays songs that fit your mood." The Boss says, "Kung Fu coffee cup!" BONK! The Boss says, "Hey, look what I invented!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags meeting, small groups, argue, alone, talk to self, annoyed, empty chairs, business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "We'll break into small groups to discuss options." Dilbert says, "Why? Do you think we'll be smarter when we're in small groups?" The Boss says, "That way everyone gets more time to talk." Dilbert says, "According to your theory, the ideal group size would be one person talking to himself." The Boss says, "No, you also need the knowledge and perspective that extra people bring." Dilbert says, "That would argue for larger groups, not smaller ones." The Boss says, "Fine! Just break into whatever size groups you think make sense." Dilbert says, "I like your style, Dilbert." Dilbert says, "Thank you for noticing."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags mother, son, sarcastic, plant, flower pot, web only company, imagination, family

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "My company is going to a web-only business model." Mom says, "That's terrific." Mom says, "What's phase three? Does it involve operating only in your own imagination?" Dilbert says, "Be nice." Mom says, "Maybe you can help me grow this plant back into a seed."