Dilbert.com by Scott Adams

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags meeting, customer, wear jacket, lazy, optimism, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says, "I'm on my way to a meeting with a prospective customer." Wally says, "We have such a long sales gestation period that the value of my efforts won't be known for two years." Wally says, "Just remember that optimism looks exactly like doing nothing."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags robot body, human brain, best talent, display case

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "I found a way to keep our best talent from leaving." Dilbert says, "Wow! You found a way to interface a human brain with a robot body to get the best of both!" The Boss says, "Actually, it's just a cool display case, but your thing would be good too."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags save money, retire, name, swear, curse, point

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says, "I finally saved enough money to retire anytime I want." Wally says, "Someone should invent a witty name for that amount of money." The Boss says, "$%@# *@U" Wally says, "Perfect! Can I use that?"