Dilbert.com by Scott Adams

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags finished contract, miocene epoch, hoof fossil, signature, rushed

View Transcript

Transcript

A lawyer says, "I just finished a contract I started during the Miocene epoch." The lawyer says, "...Assuming this hoof fossil is a signature." The lawyers says, "These things can't be rushed."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags company lawyer, simple agreement, impenetrable gibberish, sour taste, choke my suspenders, exercise, eat right, finish, health

View Transcript

Transcript

Company Lawyer Dilbert says, "Can you turn a simple agreement into impenetrable gibberish?" The lawyer says, "Absolutely. I can also leave a sour taste in everyone's mouth and make you want to choke me with my suspenders." The lawyer says, "If you exercise and eat right, you might still be alive when I finish it." Dilbert says, "Good enough."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ergonomics, guts moist, bunch up, dried up spleen

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says, "This week I focused on ergonomics." Wally says, "I kept my guts moist so they wouldn't bunch up." The Boss says, "I don't think that is ergonomics." Wally says, "tell that to my dried-up spleen."