Dilbert.com by Scott Adams

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags consultant, virtualization, project, employees, heavy thinking, obstacles, progress, business

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The Boss: I hired a consultant to help with our virtualization project because I don't trust employees with anything important. Dogbert: I will do the heavy thinking while each of you performs your usual duties as obstacles to progress. Dilbert: You said this is my project! Dogbert: I'll let him unplug something.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags servers, electricity, virtualize, trade journal, software, over shoulder, computer, boss, worker, technology, engineering

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The Boss: Our servers are using too much electricity. We need to virtualize. I did my part by reading about virtualization in a trade journal. Now you do the software part. Why is your part taking so long?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags sensitive material, interoffice, topsecret, moron, security department, slap hard, run fast

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Ted: Your most sensitive materials should always be sent in an interoffice envelope marked 'top secret. Dilbert: Are you a moron who works in our security department, or an industrial spy who is too lazy to look through lots of envelopes? The boss: Our security guys don't slap that hard or run that fast.