Dilbert.com by Scott Adams

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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"The first item of business is..." clickety clickety clickety clickety clickety clickety "What's that sound?" clickety clickety clickety clickety "Airplane." "Scooter." "Locusts." "Why does it stop when you talk?" "It landed." "It parked." "They're napping." "Okay...Anyway, I wanted to thank you all for your attendance." clickety clickety clickety clickety "I know you were concerned that my meetings were using up all of the time you had for doing work." clickety clickety clickety clickety clickety "Productivity is up, but apparently we have locusts."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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I got funding to start my own search engine company! Nothing can stop me now! Meanwhile "Fire the lawyerpult." "I'd like to talk to you about your patent." $

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Vijay, the world's most desperate venture capitalist "I started in my garage..." "Take my money!!!" "Don't you want to hear the rest?" "I don't see how it could get any better." "I have a product." "I need a forklift and massage oil now!!!"