Dilbert.com by Scott Adams

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags patent application, 3 emails, rude, insulting, condescending, back plane, gizmo

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"Remember to include my name on the patent application." "Why? You didn't help." "That's ridiculous! I've been helping you design that thing for months!" "I saved all three of your e-mails. Allow me to read them." "'Dude, is something wrong with your brain?'" "Later: 'Hey, Dilweed, maybe you should replace the backplane with a gizmo.'" "Then my personal favorite: 'Dilbag, I'm glad you took my advice to leave the backplane alone.'" "That's my way of helping." "It's great. You should patent it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags board meeting, outsourcing, ceo job, 26 million, elbonian ceo, good guy, consulting contract

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Board Meeting "I recommend outsourcing your CEO's job and saving the company $26 million per year." "For $4 per year you can hire an Elbonian CEO who is just as good as this guy." "Now do you understand why you should have renewed my consulting contract?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags double fees, management consulting, outsourcing job, india, double fee

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I found a way to double my management consulting fees. "I recommend outsourcing your job to India." "I'll double your fee if you never say that again." WAG!