Dilbert.com by Scott Adams

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dance club, allow anyone, screen potential customers, dance moves, incorporated air guitar

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I opened a dance club that's so exclusive I don't allow anyone in. "I personally screen every potential customer until I find a reason to exclude." "Have your dance moves ever incorporated the air guitar?" "Yes."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags quirky co worker, colossal waste, invented table, executive recruiter, leadership or crazy, wallet alone

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"GAAA!!! I'm changing!!!" "Suddenly I see you not as a quirky coworker, but as a colossal waste of resources!" "Do you think you matter? No, you do not. I matter." "I invented this table!" "I'd better call someone." "It's an emergency. Send the executive recruiter." "What's your status?!!" "Is it leadership or just regular crazy?" "Too soon to tell." "Hey! Leave my wallet alone!" "He's one of ours."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags eat you alive, do my bidding, boss's pet

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"For a boss's pet, you're nice." "I see no reason to be unkind." "Buwhahaha! We're alone now, nerdling! Do my bidding or I will eat you alive!!!" "They always forget to factor in your head size."