Dilbert.com by Scott Adams
Tuesday January 11,
2005
Tags stock - picking software, more feauture, make hair grow, bald guys, test on rat, butticks
Transcript
Dogbert: My stock-picking software needs more features. "I think I'll add a module that claims to make hair grow on bald guys. I'll first test it on a rat." Ratbert: "I feel a new one on my buttocks!" Dogbert: "That's all the proof I need."
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Monday January 10,
2005
Tags create software, small investors, pick stocks, past trends, hubris, ignorance, testimonials
Transcript
Dogbert: I'm creating software that will help small investors pick stocks. "It combines past trends that are not indicative of the future with the user's hubris and ignorance." "Now all I need are testimonials from people whose results are not typical!" Dilbert: "So it works?"
Sunday January 09,
2005
Tags upgrade computer, non standard equipment, cubicle, den, non stardard, onitor, healing, clense, upgraded computer, abacus
Transcript
I asked the I.T. department to upgrade my computer. "They're coming here??!" "We must hide our non-standard equipment!" "Uh-oh." "So-o-o... this den of non-standardization must be your cubicle." "This non-standard printer is coming with me. And I don't remember that monitor on our list." "I must cleanse your cubicle of non-conformancce so the healing can begin." "Surely my upgraded computer will arrive soon." Months later "Abacus?" "Please shut up."

