Dilbert.com by Scott Adams

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags other people, problems, discomfort, effect on oether, oblivious

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I've noticed that all my problems are caused by other people. Dilbert: Ive noticed that all of my problems are caused by other people. Yet ut seen sos unlikely that other people would cause me so much discomfort while i never bother anyone. Is it possible that Im oblivious to my effect on others? dogcart: ZZZZZ

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags fall asleep, runny nose, sneaks in, pinches nostrils shut

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert: Why does a runny nose stop running when you fall asleep? Dogbert: The nose fairly sneaks in at night and inches your nostrils shut. Ratbert: This is exactly why I don't like knowledge.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags accomplishments, past 3 months, cutsomers, misconceptions, objective, home computer, paraphase, flew to wrong city, upgraded computer

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: "What? You have no accomplishments this month???" "What did you do for the past three months?" Dilbert: "Well, I spent much of that time correcting misconceptions that you gave to our customers." "And I attended meetings with you to keep you from creating additional misconceptions." "I spent a month working on an objective that you forgot to tell me didn't matter." "I flew to the wrong city for a meeting because you confused Houston with Austin." "And I upgraded your home computer so you wouldn't have to pay someone to do it." "Allow me to paraphrase: Blah, blah, blah, you didn't accomplish anything."