Dilbert.com by Scott Adams
Friday April 02,
2021
Dogbert Makes A Deal
Tags business, business ethics, managers & supervisors, subordinates, behavior, accusation, press, douse, gasoline, fire, deal, fairness, negotiators
Transcript
dogbert: i made a deal with all of the subordinates who accused you of inappropriate behavior. they will stop talking to the press if you agree to let them douse you with gasoline and set you on fire. ceo: that's the best deal you could get me? dogbert: in all fairness, they are great negotiators, and i don't like you.
Thursday April 01,
2021
Ruined The Stock Price
Tags business, technology, stock, subordinate, inappropriate, behavior, bonus, money, paper towel, ceo, work
Transcript
boss: our stock is down because seventy-three subordinates accused our ceo of inappropriate behavior at work. so i can't give you a bonus even though your work was excellent. co-worker's head explodes: Boom!!! Carol: how'd he take it? Boss: grab some paper towels.
Wednesday March 31,
2021
Dogbert Is Selective
Tags business, consultant, crisis, selective, client, jail, advice, folksy, wisdom
Transcript
title: dogbert the crisis consultant. dilbert and dogbert on a walk. dogbert: i'm very selective about my clients. that's because clients who take my advice usually end up in jail. so i only take clients i hate. dilbert: i like your folksy wisdom.


