Dilbert.com by Scott Adams
Wednesday January 01,
2003
Tags selective breeding, produce offspring, no biometric impression, no pulse, no fingerprints, no dna
Transcript
Wally says, "For thousands of generations the males in my family practiced selective breeding." Wally continues, "The goal was to produce offspring that leave no biometric impression: no pulse, no fingerprints, no DNA." Dilbert asks, "Why?" Wally responds, "We like to ask, 'Why not?'"
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Tuesday December 31,
2002
Tags bio metric, security system, checks pulse, heat, fingerprints, wally, indentify
Transcript
The Boss introduces an employee, "Bob will demonstrate our new biometric security system." Bob motions towards the machine and says, "The system checks for pulse, heat and fingerprints to identify each employee." Wally puts his hand on the machine and says, "It says I don't have any of those things." Bob replies, "Are you the one they call Wally?"
Monday December 30,
2002
Tags power point presentation, ceo slip trance, subliminal suggestions, increase budget, more budget, kill boss, pointy haired monster
Transcript
Dilbert is sitting at his computer. The Boss approaches and says, "Make your 'Power-point' presentation so boring that our CEO will slip into trance." The Boss continues, "Then I'll whisper to him subliminal suggestions to increase our budget." The CEO is asleep. The Boss whispers, "More budget." On the other side of the CEO, Wally whispers, "Kill the pointy-haired monster."

