Dilbert.com by Scott Adams
Wednesday September 05,
2001
Tags no problems, week, issues, opportunites, challenges, valuable learning experinces
Transcript
The Boss, Wally, and Dilbert are sitting at a conference table. Wally says to The Boss, "I'm pleased to report that I had no problems this week." Wally continues, "I only had issues, opportunities, challenges, and valuable learning experiences." The Boss replies, "Did you do any work?" Wally responds, "It didn't seem necessary."
Tuesday September 04,
2001
Tags profits down, profits went up, putting in context, senior mangement, weak economy, meeting, business
Transcript
The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "Profits are down. Our senior management blames the weak economy." Dilbert responds, "So they're saying that profits went UP because of great management and DOWN because of a weak economy?" The Boss responds, annoyed, "These meetings will go faster if you stop putting things in context." Dilbert replies quietly, "Sorry."
Monday September 03,
2001
Tags down sized, laid off, let go, thrilled to be fired, severance package
Transcript
The Boss finishes firing an employee and says, "...Effective immediately." The employee clenches his fists in happiness and yells, "YES!" The employee dances on his chair and yells, "Ah-ooga! Woo-hoo!" The Boss looks surprised. The Boss suggests to Catbert, "We can make the severance packages less generous."


