Dilbert.com by Scott Adams
Tuesday January 05,
2021
Dna Says Wally Will Steal
Tags business, psychology, dna, steal, office supplies, junk, science, experts, listen
Transcript
Catbert: wally, according to your dna, the odds of you stealing office supplies later this week are nearly 100%. wally: that sounds like junk science. catbert to boss: he refuses to listen to experts.
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Monday January 04,
2021
Loser Dna
Tags business, performance, review, dna, lying, test, impossible
Transcript
catbird: from now on, your performance reviews will be based on your dna alone. your boss can't tell when you are lying about you accomplishments, but a simple test can tell me if you have loser dna. dilbert: i don't believe that is possible. catbird: that response is how i know you have it your test is done.
Sunday January 03,
2021
Increasing Training Budget
Tags business, office workers, budget, training, research & development, company, bankrupt
Transcript
boss to tina: i'm planning to increase the budget for training by fifty percent next year. tina to dilbert: he didn't say anything about the other budgets. dilbert to wally: he didn't say anything about the budget for research and development. wally to alice: sounds like he's phasing out research and development. alice to asok: he wouldn't phase out research and development unless he knows the company is failing. asok to carol: the company must be going bankrupt. carol to boss: the company is bankrupt. boss thinking: i guess i don't need to increase the training budget.

