Dilbert.com by Scott Adams

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dna, feed her, human genome, human simulations, invented, mapped and decoded, market application, on computer watch, punish her, samples, software, software simulation, engineering

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Asok points to his diagram as he explains to the group, "My software will create human simulations from DNA samples." The Boss asks Asok, "What's the market application?" Asok answers, "Well...there are many various applications." The Boss says to Asok, "Name one." Asok begins to explain, "Well...someday the entire human genome will be mapped and decoded." Asok continues, "You could take a hair sample from a woman who refuses to date you..." Asok continues to explain, "and create a software simulation of her to keep in your computer watch." Asok says, "You could have one button to feed her and one button to punish her." Wally replies, "I'd buy it." The Boss asks Asok, "Can you add a button?"

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Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dna, feed her, human genome, human simulations, invented, mapped and decoded, market application, on computer watch, punish her, samples, software, software simulation, engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok points to his diagram as he explains to the group, "My software will create human simulations from DNA samples." The Boss asks Asok, "What's the market application?" Asok answers, "Well...there are many various applications." The Boss says to Asok, "Name one." Asok begins to explain, "Well...someday the entire human genome will be mapped and decoded." Asok continues, "You could take a hair sample from a woman who refuses to date you..." Asok continues to explain, "and create a software simulation of her to keep in your computer watch." Asok says, "You could have one button to feed her and one button to punish her." Wally replies, "I'd buy it." The Boss asks Asok, "Can you add a button?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags alice screams, jaw unhinges, mad, frighten hoagie, lunch room, break room, screams at lulu, frightening

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Alice: LULU, you've stalled my project for long enough, I want your input. NOW!! Alice: I found out my jaw unhinges when Im mad> Asok: You frighten my hoagie.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags employee of month, lulu, overcame odds, to win, name randomly picked, victory, last month

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The Boss: The employee of the month is LULU. LULU overcame long odds to win this award. I.E. her name was randomly picked. Wally: Id protest but I don't want to taint my victory of last month.