Dilbert.com by Scott Adams

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags shredder, rigged, sadistic coowrker, void the warranty, marketing, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice, Dilbert and wally sit at lunch. Alice says, "Don't use the shredder today." Alice says, "I rigged it to kill our new sadistic nut co-worker." Dilbert says, "Whoa! Whoa!" Dilbert says, "Doesn't that void the warranty?" Alice says, "I'll switch shredders with marketing tomorrow."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags catbert, director, co workers, sadistic, big nut, party, spinach dip

View Transcript

Transcript

Caption: Catbert: H.R. Director" Catbert has the sadistic nut in his office. Catbert says, "Your co-workers say you're a sadistic nut." Catbert says, "Gimme five, you big nut! and keep up the good work!" Catbert says, "Hey, I'm having a party on Saturday. Can you make it?" The sadistic nut says, "Sure! I'll bring my spinach dip."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags human resources, job interview, name, tubby, human resources dept, sent resume, entrepreneur, toby, made up name, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Caption reads: "Catbert the Director of Human Resources." Catbert stands on the table in front of a prospective applicant. He says, "So, you want a job here, Tubby?" The man replies, "It's 'Toby.'" Catbert looks at the sheet of paper in his hand and asks, "Did you just correct me?" The man says, "Um..." Catbert turns and shouts at the man, "I alone will determine your name!!" Catbert looks at him and asks, "Now, what is your name?" The man answers, "Tubby." Catbert reads the paper and says, "Tubby, is it true that you're so dumb that you..." Catbert holds out the paper and continues, "...Sent your resume to the human resources department?" The man looks frightened as Catbert continues, "Do you think that's what this department does? Let me show you what I do." The man is seen walking down the hall, his clothes torn into shreds and looking beaten up. The man says, "I think I just became an entrepreneur."